Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 8

into the suitcase.
    "Stop, stop, stop." Devin turned Sammy to face him again, this time holding his shoulders so he couldn't turn away. "Just listen," he said when Sammy opened his mouth to interrupt. "You blindsided me. I can't think of any other way to say it. When you came on to me, everything I thought I knew about you changed. I never expected anything to happen between us but I never wanted you to think I don't care about you."
    "I know you do, as a friend," Sam said. "You may not have seen it, but I felt something between us. I always thought it never went further because your feelings for Mike were stronger. After that night, I know it's because you're drawn to me, but not enough to do anything about it."
    "That's not it," Devin said. "Well, part of it is, but I really... I never took the time to think about how I feel about you. You've just been there and I took it for granted that you always would be. And I know I never thought about what it might mean to you." Devin picked up Sam's suitcase from the bed and pushed it onto the floor. It landed with a thunk. Several shirts tumbled out. Devin sat on the bed and pulled Sam to settle next to him.
    "When I talked to Mike, one of the things he said stuck with me. He said I can't treat you like other guys I've been with. And he's right. I've spent so much time bouncing in and out of bed with men who didn't mean anything to me and I can't do that with you." Devin swallowed around the lump in his throat. "You mean too much to me. The last thing I wanted was to fall into bed drunk the other night. I thought you'd regret it the next day and I knew I would." He raised a hand to cup Sammy's cheek. "You deserve more than that. And if we're going to do this, we're going to do it right."
    "So, it wasn't a no, it was a not while you can barely stand up on your own?"
    Devin nodded. "But the more I thought about it, the more I realized this wouldn't work. I don't know how to do this, with you."
    "I'm just me. It's not complicated."
    "But it is. There aren't a lot of people I'm really close to. If I screw this up, I'll never be able to forgive myself." Devin swallowed hard. "I care about you too much to take that chance."
    "I want to take a chance with you," Sammy said. "It doesn't feel like a risk to me."
    "Maybe you don't know me well enough. I'm a mess. I can't be what you need and it wouldn't be fair to you. Or maybe that's what it is for you. You fix people who are broken in some way, but I don't want to be that kind of burden on you. I don't want you to look at everything that's wrong with me and realize you made a mistake one day."
    "Devin, I don't think of you like a patient. You're not broken."
    "There's something wrong with me. Every relationship I touch turns to shit."
    "That's not true." Sam frowned. "I don't know who made you feel like you need to be fixed—"
    "My family," Devin supplied.
    "I don't know what they said to you to make you feel like you're unworthy of love, but you're wrong. They're wrong. I know you. I know your fear comes from being rejected because you're not someone else's idea of perfect. But none of us are. You're stubborn and insecure and reckless." Sam reached up to stroke his cheek. "You're also funny and sexy and softhearted. I hate that you push people away when you need them the most, but that's how you protect yourself from being hurt. It took me a while, but I see through all those carefully constructed walls to a man who is capable of so much love. I see you, the good and the bad," Sam said, dropping his hand to rub Devin's chest, "and I want you. Being scared of something new is perfectly natural, but the only way you could hurt me is if you lie to me or cheat on me."
    "I would never do that."
    "Then this is simple. I love you exactly the way you are. All you have to do is love me back," Sam said, his voice dropping to whisper a promise across Devin's skin. Every inch of him became aware of their proximity, the way Sam's eyes bore into his, the promises that lay behind them, just waiting to be fulfilled. Sam closed the distance between them.
    Sam's lips were soft, pliant, moving against Dev's with such delicate pressure, he held himself back, afraid to spoil this new thing between them by moving too fast. A hand squeezing the back of his neck urged him closer, faint moans encouraging his thrusting tongue. Luxurious pleasure unfurled heat deep in his belly and Dev moved against Sam, one hand sliding against his shorts, pushing them up