Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 8

wanted different stuff in bed because he loved to bottom and he got mad that I didn't really like to fuck him, that it didn't make me hard, and Stef started looking elsewhere again and this is so fucking embarrassing I can't believe I'm willing to tell you this except it must prove that I love you..."
    Trey leaned forward awkwardly and caught enough of the corner of Josh's mouth in a kiss to shut him up. Then he said into Josh's ear, "The first time Charlie deep-throated me, I almost threw up."
    Josh turned so abruptly their cheeks came together with a painful thump. Trey winced back, loosening his hold, but Josh's hands clamped over his arms, holding them in place. Josh settled again, carefully looking away from Trey and said, "Charlie?"
    "He was kind of my Stef. Well, not really, because I never came that close to falling in love with him. But he was a great guy. He was older than me. He worked as a mechanic for ten years before he got his GED and started working himself through college, where I met him. He picked me up over a lunch in the student union; he knew somehow I was gay when I still wasn't owning it. God, he was patient. We went out for months before we got beyond hand jobs and some frotting. And like I said, on that first blow job, I looked down at him with my dick stuffed way down his throat and it was a disaster. The second one was pretty awesome though."
    "But you never fell for him?"
    "Not all the way. I think I was too young for him. He healed me and took care of me, but I wasn't ready to be a real partner to him." And he wasn't you. It was somewhere around the one year mark with Charlie that Trey had let himself admit how much each tiny contact with Josh meant. Acknowledged the fact that he spent twice as long composing a weekly email to Josh as he did writing a term paper or making love with Charlie. He'd thought it was futile and idiotic, but he'd admitted it.
    It was getting cool now, with the wind gusting and the sun lost over the edge of the world. But Josh just settled back against Trey, and Trey eased down onto the sand more comfortably, completely willing to just stay there and share body heat. Josh grabbed another beer and popped the top. Trey said mildly, "I guess I'm driving."
    "I can handle four beers."
    "You might still blow over the limit if we get pulled over."
    Josh grunted and took a long drink.
    Trey said carefully, "What about the other guys after Stef? Did things get better? In bed, I mean."
    "There weren't any for a couple of years." Josh ran his tongue around the opening of the beer can. Trey wondered if the sexy move was deliberate or unconscious; whichever, it was making his pants tighter. He shifted slightly behind Josh.
    "The next guy I was with was Bran," Josh continued reflectively. "By the time I met him Felix was a freshman and had a girlfriend and was coming out of his shell. His last therapist was good, or maybe it was just the effects of time. Felix had even told me about this guy on his dorm floor who was gay and how no one cared, including him. So I was in a good place when I met Bran. And he was all about the oral, didn't care if we never did anything else. He was a sweet guy, if not all that bright. Just easy to be with. We had fun for a few months, until he got transferred to Albuquerque. And there have been a few since then. A lot more girls, though."
    Trey decided that was probably quite enough. He'd wanted to know, but hearing Josh talk casually about the guys he'd fucked was either revving Trey up or making him mad, or maybe both. His heart rate was up and he felt warm despite the breeze. He bent to nip at the rim of Josh's ear. "I think I need a demonstration that you're over your anxiety."
    Josh twisted to turn the move into an open-mouthed kiss. For uncounted moments Trey tried to show Josh with his lips and tongue and breath how close he wanted to be. Josh was panting hard by the time they separated.
    "Home," Josh said. "Bed. Where I can show you better."
    "So... how relaxed about things are you? Do you want to have my ass or does that still bother you?"
    "It doesn't bother me, really, but I think... I'd rather have you fuck me."
    Trey had been leaning away, reaching to zip up the cooler, but at that he froze. After a moment he finished stowing the empties and zipping up the lid. He stood and nudged Josh's hip with his foot. "Get off the towel. I want to shake the sand out of it."
    Josh stood too and stepped back. Trey bent and picked up the towel. The