Love Means No Shame - Andrew Grey

took off around the barn and out across the pasture.
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Love Means … NO SHAME
    Geoff felt free and light as they rode. As a child, this was where he’d been happiest. In the safety of the pasture, he gave Kirk his head and let him run, the wind whipping his hair and shirt as the powerful animal shot across the pasture. Some of the sorrow from earlier in the day dissipated and his spirit began to soar along with Kirk’s.
    As they approached the far side of the meadow, he reined the horse in. Kirk began to slow to a canter and finally a walk. “You’re such a good boy, you know that?” Geoff patted the horse’s neck as he waited for Len.
    “That felt good,” Geoff said.
“I bet it did.” Len was smiling a little as well. “He’d want us to be happy.”
“I know; I’m just finding it hard right now.”
    “Come on. I have something to show you.” Len led the way down the wooded trail that led to the river, winding beneath tall trees and around shrubs and brush. When they reached the water, he guided them down a small path for about fifty feet and then stopped, getting off his horse. “This is it.” Geoff looked around. The water was sending sparkles of light across the leaves. “Is this where you and dad—?”
    “Yes. This is where he and I had a lot of firsts, and where he and I came to talk when we didn’t want little ears to hear.” Len looked around. “I can feel him; it’s like he’s here with me.” He shook away his grief and looked at Geoff, a very serious expression on his face. “You have a decision you need to make. Your father put the land, farm, and all of the accounts in both his and your names about five years ago.” Geoff started to say something, but Len stopped him. “They are yours now, and you have a decision to make. You could sell them—and they’d bring in a great deal of 19
    Andrew Grey
money—but then they’d be gone, along with your heritage. This land was your great-grandfather’s, and now it’s yours.”
“Is that what you brought me here to tell me?”
    “No. I brought you here to tell you that I can tell you’re not happy. And don’t think for a minute that we both didn’t know you were sleeping with every man who came along.” Geoff became indignant. “How…?”
    Len silenced him. “I know what that’s like because I did it before I met your father. It’s hollow, lonely, and deeply unsatisfying, particularly when compared with waking next to someone you love.” Geoff’s anger deflated as he heard the truth in what Len was saying. “I know you like your job, but does it compare to riding Kirk across the pasture like you just did?” Geoff had the feeling that Len was searching for something in his face.
    “Your father wanted you to carry on here; he just didn’t expect it to be so soon. Neither of us did.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
Len stepped forward, embracing him tightly. “You don’t have to say anything now. You just have to decide what it is you really want.” “But I’m an accountant.”
    Len laughed, really laughed, for the first time since Geoff had arrived. “And this is primarily a business, and a very successful one, I might add.” Geoff had never thought of it that way—to him it was just home. “Come on, we need to get back before the vultures start circling your aunt.”
    “Go on, I’ll be along in a minute,” Geoff said.
Len mounted and headed back down the trail, leaving Geoff alone with his thoughts. “Well, Kirk, what do you think?” The horse 20 Love Means … NO SHAME
    bobbed and shook his head. “Yeah, me too.” Geoff remounted, and they walked back to the farm. As soon as they hit the pasture, Kirk took off again, and Geoff urged him on.

    They were both breathing heavily when he led Kirk back to his stall. Geoff removed the saddle and brushed the horse down again, making sure he had water and oats before putting the tack away.
    Joey was in the tack room, cleaning up and making sure everything was in order. “How long have you worked here?” Geoff asked. Joey turned around, startled. “Um… just a month or so. Len is teaching me how to ride in exchange for working in the barn.” “I’m Geoff.” He extended his hand and the younger man took it, “It’s good to meet you.”
“I’m sorry about your dad. He was a real nice man.”
“Thanks. Are you almost done here?”
“Yeah, I was just finishing up.”
“Then why don’t you come up to the house and have some dinner? I’m sure