Lucy in the Sky

was the blokes at work. Zoe’s just a friend.’
    ‘I didn’t know you were friends with her?’ I push, confused.
    ‘Yeah, of course we’re friends. I work with her, don’t I?’
    ‘Did you stay with her on Saturday night?’
    ‘I crashed over there, yes,’ he replies, a touch defensively.
    ‘Where was Jim?’ I ask, and I just know what’s coming.
    ‘They broke up.’
    Surprise, surprise.
    I laugh at him, bitterly. ‘You are full of BULLSHIT!’
    ‘Lucy, calm down!’
    ‘Don’t you dare tell me to calm down! My friend saw you! You had your arm around her! Don’t tell me she’s just a friend because I DON’T BELIEVE YOU!’
    ‘She is just a friend,’ he tells me steadily, but keeps his distance.
    ‘Liar!’
    ‘Lucy, calm down.’ He comes towards me, his face contorted with frustration. ‘She is Just. A. Friend,’ he insists. ‘I was comforting her because her boyfriend, you know, the one you thought was such a nice guy in Spain, fucking CHEATED on her!’ His voice becomes angrier with every word that comes out of his mouth. He runs his hand through his hair and turns to me, coldly. ‘Do you realise how lucky you are?’ he asks. ‘Do you? I had to sit there at Zoe’s house on Saturday night while she bawled her eyes out because Jim is a lying, cheating son-of-a-bitch. The poor girl was beside herself. So, do you, Lucy? Do you realise how bloody lucky you are that I wouldn’t do that to you?’
    I look at him, unable to work out if he’s lying or not. I want to believe him. I do want to believe him. But he doesn’t try to convince me. He’s waiting to see what I say.
    ‘I don’t want you seeing her anymore,’ is what I come back with.
    ‘ What? ’ he asks, confused.
    ‘I don’t want you seeing her anymore,’ I repeat determinedly.
    ‘Lucy, that’s ridiculous.’ He laughs hollowly. ‘I work with her. We’re friends. I’m not going to not see her.’
    ‘Do you fancy her?’ I ask him.
    ‘No!’ he exclaims.
    ‘I don’t believe you.’
    ‘I don’t!’ he insists. ‘This is about Nathan, isn’t it?’ he asks, and I look at him meaningfully, but don’t answer. ‘Oh, for fuck’s sake,’ he says.
    ‘He’s just a friend,’ I tell him bluntly. ‘Just like Zoe. He hasn’t done anything wrong.’
    ‘It’s not the same.’
    ‘Yes, it is,’ I respond firmly, and he doesn’t speak for a while. I add, ‘Maybe the four of us should go out sometime, just as friends and see how we get on?’ He’s clearly not keen on that idea. ‘Seriously,’ I continue, ‘I think you should meet Nathan. You’d get on with him. And he is my friend, James,’ I say, my voice softening. ‘I really do want to be friends with him. Just friends.’
    ‘Okay,’ he speaks finally. ‘But if he ever tries anything on with you I’m going to knock his fucking block off.’

Chapter 22
    The girls try to persuade me to join them for Friday-night drinks, but I’m determined to have a quiet night in. I attempt to explain James’s behaviour on Primrose Hill with Zoe but, even as I’m saying it, I know it sounds lame. Although they probably don’t believe his excuse, they make a reasonable show of pretending to. While I don’t like the fact that Chloe and Gemma doubt him, there’s nothing I can do.
    James goes out for a big night with his work, even though I ask him not to stay out too late. When, at about 10 p.m., I text him to ask where he is and he doesn’t reply immediately, I call him. There’s no answer so I call him again. And again. Eventually he picks up and the noise from the crowded bar he’s in is deafening. I shout down the phone but he can’t hear me. I shout as loudly as I can, worrying about the neighbours, and ask him to go outside so we can talk. He shouts back that he’s leaving soon. And that, unfortunately, is that.
    An hour and a half later he comes home, by which time I’m in bed, trying to sleep. I sit up and ask him groggily if she was there.
    ‘Was who where?’ he answers, trying to sound less pissed than he obviously is.
    ‘You know who I mean,’ I snap. ‘ZOE!’
    ‘Shush, Lucy, ow!’ He stumbles, putting his hand to his ear.
    ‘Don’t shush me,’ I loudly reply, and he groans, slumping down on the end of the bed.
    ‘Thought we were past all this,’ he moans sadly, and I immediately feel sorry. Yes, I’m annoyed with him for staying out so late and no, I’m not comfortable with the whole Zoe thing, especially now that my work friends