Lucy in the Sky

it’s being evacuated. The woman next to me feels faint, and I have to shout at people to move further down the carriage to try to give her some air. A nightmarish half an hour later, the train finally starts up and moves off.
    I always do my make-up in front of the wardrobe mirror, sitting cross-legged on the floor. I dig out a black headband and drag it over my forehead, pulling my fringe away from my eyes. Then I fish out my tinted moisturiser and squeeze a tiny amount onto my palm.
    The doorbell rings. Oh, bollocks, they’re here and I’m not ready. I look around the room: unmade bed, half-covered with clothes, make-up spilling over the floor…I won’t be showing Nathan the bedroom, then. I listen to James’s welcoming voice as they come up the stairs. He’ll sort them out with beers until I get out there. Done with my foundation I quickly hunt out my green Shu Uemura eyeshadow and rub my finger over it, smudging it across one eyelid. I do the same on the other eye. Then I rummage around in my bag for my mascara. There’s a knock at the door. Shit! ‘Come in?’ I pray it’ll be James.
    ‘Hi,’ Nathan says as he peers in. ‘Happy birthday.’
    ‘Thanks. Sorry, I’m still getting ready.’
    He opens the door further and comes in. I desperately want to pull the headband off my head.
    ‘This place is amazing,’ he says, talking about our flat. He towers above me and then sits down on the floor behind me, beer in hand. I swivel around to face him, my feet almost grazing his leg.
    ‘Did you find us okay?’
    ‘Yeah, no problem. Good directions.’ He takes a swig from the bottle.
    ‘I was running a bit late; got stuck on the tube,’ I explain, turning back to the mirror and picking up my mascara wand. It doesn’t look like he’s going anywhere so I may as well get on with it and try to ignore the mess.
    ‘Oh, really? Which line?’
    ‘Listen to you, which line. You sound like a Londoner already.’
    He chuckles and I tell him about my journey, while I finish my make-up. Finally I tug off my headband and fluff out my fringe.
    ‘Okay, done,’ I say. He pushes himself up and holds his hand down to help me up. I squeeze by him, palm still ablaze from his touch, and lead the way out towards the kitchen. Damn it, damn it, damn it!
    James and Richard are watching the rugby. ‘No!’ James shouts, as one team–I think it’s pretty safe to assume the opposition–scores a try. Nathan follows me into the kitchen and leans against the counter while I open the cupboard, searching for some honey-coated peanuts and cashews.
    ‘Nut?’ I offer him, trying to sound normal.
    ‘Thanks.’
    ‘Do you need another beer?’
    ‘Nah, it’s okay. Still going.’ He’s wearing a black jumper and dark blue jeans. They look new. I pour myself a glass of white wine and we look at each other sideways, locking eyes until it starts to feel uncomfortable.
    ‘Where are we off to tonight?’ he says finally.
    ‘Just down Marylebone High Street,’ I reply, and turn my attention to finding a cashew amongst the peanuts.
    My stomach seems to be hosting a birthday party of its own.
    Chloe and Gemma are already at the bar when we arrive, brimming with anticipation. They don’t know which one is Nathan and they look quite comical, eyes darting from guy to guy, waiting to be introduced.
    ‘Hello, you two.’ James smiles and kisses them.
    ‘Chloe, Gemma, this is Richard and this is Nathan…’
    ‘Phwoar!’ Chloe exclaims in my ear as soon as the boys move aside to queue at the bar. I urge her to keep her voice down, but naturally I’m delighted with her reaction.
    ‘That Richard’s a bit of alright, too.’ She giggles.
    ‘Single,’ I tell her and the look on her face makes me want to laugh. She’s unstoppable.
    Reena and Karen arrive together with Paul and Alan and shower me with kisses and presents. It’s Karen’s birthday next week so I wish her a good one in advance and hand over her gift, a leather washbag from The White Company. Definitely not a freebie.
    ‘Is that him?’ she whispers in my ear, looking at Richard and barely acknowledging the parcel in her hand.
    ‘No,’ I whisper back. ‘He’s at the bar.’
    ‘Which one?’
    ‘Stop looking. Here he comes now.’
    ‘He is gorgeous,’ she concedes and my heart fills with joy for asplit second before she continues. ‘But that’s no excuse to fuck James around.’
    ‘Oh, Karen, please don’t start.’
    ‘Alright. I’ll let you off. Seeing