Me Before You: A Novel

way she never stared at Will, no matter how rude he was to her.
    ‘It’s a really good job, Mummy. It’s the one I’ve been working towards for the last two years.’ She glanced over at her father. ‘I can’t put my whole life on hold just because of Will’s mental state.’
    There was a long silence.
    ‘This isn’t fair. If it was me in the chair, would you have asked Will to put all his plans on hold?’
    Mrs Traynor didn’t look at her daughter. I glanced down at my list, reading and rereading the first paragraph.
    ‘I have a life too, you know.’ It came out like a protest.
    ‘Let’s discuss this some other time.’ Mr Traynor’s hand landed on his daughter’s shoulder and squeezed it gently.
    ‘Yes, let’s.’ Mrs Traynor began to shuffle the papers in front of her. ‘Right, then. I propose we do it like this. I want to know everything you are planning,’ she said, looking up at me. ‘I want to do the costings and, if possible, I’d like a schedule so that I can try and plan some time offto come along with you. I have some unused holiday entitlement left that I can –’
    ‘No.’
    We all turned to look at Mr Traynor. He was stroking the dog’s head and his expression was gentle, but his voice was firm. ‘No. I don’t think you should go, Camilla. Will should be allowed to do this by himself.’
    ‘Will can’t do it by himself, Steven. There is an awful lot that needs to be considered when Will goes anywhere. It’s complicated. I don’t think we can really leave it to –’
    ‘No, darling,’ he repeated. ‘Nathan can help, and Louisa can manage just fine.’
    ‘But –’
    ‘Will needs to be allowed to feel like a man. That is not going to be possible if his mother – or his sister, for that matter – is always on hand.’
    I felt briefly sorry for Mrs Traynor then. She still wore that haughty look of hers, but I could see underneath that she seemed a little lost, as if she couldn’t quite understand what her husband was doing. Her hand went to her necklace.
    ‘I will make sure he’s safe,’ I said. ‘And I will let you know everything we’re planning on doing, well in advance.’
    Her jaw was so rigid that a little muscle was visible just underneath her cheekbone. I wondered if she actually hated me then.
    ‘I want Will to want to live too,’ I said, finally.
    ‘We do understand that,’ Mr Traynor said. ‘And we do appreciate your determination. And discretion.’ I wondered whether that word was in relation to Will, or something else entirely, and then he stood up and I realized that it was mysignal to leave. Georgina and her mother still sat on the sofa, saying nothing. I got the feeling there was going to be a whole lot more conversation once I was out of the room.
    ‘Right, then,’ I said. ‘I’ll draw you up the paperwork as soon as I’ve worked it all out in my head. It will be soon. We haven’t much … ’
    Mr Traynor patted my shoulder.
    ‘I know. Just let us know what you come up with,’ he said.
    Treena was blowing on her hands, her feet moving involuntarily up and down, as if marching on the spot. She was wearing my dark-green beret, which, annoyingly, looked much better on her than it did on me. She leant over and pointed at the list she had just pulled from her pocket, and handed it to me.
    ‘You’re probably going to have to scratch number three, or at least put that off until it gets warmer.’
    I checked the list. ‘Quadriplegic basketball? I’m not even sure if he likes basketball.’
    ‘That’s not the point. Bloody hell, it’s cold up here.’ She pulled the beret lower over her ears. ‘The point is, it will give him a chance to see what’s possible. He can see that there are other people just as badly off as him who are doing sports and things.’
    ‘I’m not sure. He can’t even lift a cup. I think these people must be paraplegic. I can’t see that you could throw a ball without the use of your arms.’
    ‘You’re missing the point. He doesn’t have to actually
do
anything, but it’s about widening his horizons, right? We’re letting him see what other handicapped people are doing.’
    ‘If you say so.’
    A low murmur rose in the crowd. The runners had been sighted, some distance away. If I went on to tiptoes, I could just make them out, probably two miles away, down in the valley, a small block of bobbing white dots forcing their way through the cold along a damp, grey road. I glanced at my watch. We had been