Naked Hero - The Journey Away

temptation of the man - and again he fought to resist. “But sadly she’s wasted her efforts.”
    “Really?” quizzed Lee genuinely disappointed. Cool calculation evaporating in the heat.
    “Yeah, really,” confirmed Lewis. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, under different circumstance I would leap at the chance. Last night... Well, that’s by the by now. But as things stand, it just wouldn’t be right for me... I told you before that I want to give my career a shot, and if I allowed things to go any further between us it would mess with my head – and I can’t afford that right now. But at the same time, you’ve become a friend, someone I can talk to. I’ve never had that before - you know... a mate. I like having you around. It was really good yesterday. I don’t want to lose that.”
    “Sex doesn’t necessarily change things,” Lee protested, losing his own clear purpose for a moment.
    Lewis laughed at him, knowing fine well that Lee was half right. “No, I don’t suppose it does for you. But it would for me. Sex with strangers is fine – move on and forget, but I can’t do that with a friend. And I’d sooner you remember me as the guy you didn’t have sex with, because our friendship was more important. I want to keep that. If I were to let anything else happen then I just know I’d want more... much, much more... not just an encore the following morning. And that’s not going to happen – not with you. This way is better – for me anyway - assuming you still want to be friends...”
    Lee looked puzzled. He was trying to understand, but he was still a newcomer to the emotional aspect of relationships, so he needed a little clarification.
    Lewis laid it out as plainly as he could , continuing, “...I need simplicity, and that means clear boundaries, or else I end up in a head-fuck like I did last night. If I’m involved with someone beyond a one-night stand then I’d want commitment, and I’d want fidelity. Stupid, I know, but there you go – we’re all different. If we can keep it simple and just be friends then I know where I stand and there’re no expectations. Without sex messing things up I can still see you and call you up for a chat... and not worry about who you’re with if you don’t answer. Not worry when I see your name in the papers, spotted out with some bloke. Because you’re my friend, and you can do what you like, be with who you want. And even if there is some sort of agenda on your part - I’ll still be there for you: help you whenever you need it just like you’ve helped me. That’s what friends do, isn’t it? Help each other.”
    Well that made it clear! And it was the logical way forward: everything out in the open, even the agenda could now be raised. Cool calculation had won the day... and Lee Porter felt totally deflated. “Do you want me to head back to Sydney?” he asked, forgetting in his disappointment his objective for a moment. “It was just the one match I was coming for, and you didn’t need me anyway.”
    “No! I’d like you to stay - that’s if you want to, and you can spare the time. Have you got work that you need to get back for?”
    Lee shrugged. “Nothing the lads can’t handle... so of course I’ll stay. And I know what you mean... friends. That’s better... It would have been good, though,” said Lee with a cockish smile.
    Lewis smiled back, a little abashed. “I bet! That’s the problem: too good,” he replied, surprising himself with the confidence to admit to such a thing - that he trusted the friendship element of this relationship to the degree of such honesty. It felt good, like their friendship had been sealed with the acknowledgement of mutual desire that was being sacrifice. It allowed him to carry on and open up even more.
    “I did need you, though. I still do. You can talk to me about something other than tennis. No one else seems to be able to do that. So, if you’re going to hang around, why don’t you take me to one of those galleries you mentioned you like to go to? Thursday would be good, whether I’m still in the tournament or not. We can do a bit of culture. What do you say?”
    “Okay. It’s a date,” replied Lee, accepting his role: the role of friend, who could still call upon the favour if Lewis were to make the final, and if only for a day become his perfect man. As a friend, he could own up to what he had planned. He could ask for the prize instead of take it: his empty prize. And perhaps