Nobody's Fool

Enterprises was now, at the last minute, pulling out, refusing to exercise its option, having chosen instead to build their amusement park near Portland, Maine. The
Sentinel
had reported the reasons they’d given for this most recent decision. The tract of land between North Bath and the interstate that had seemed so huge to residents of the region had seemed to the developers only marginally adequate, and adequate only if they could content themselves not to expand at a later date. The fact that the land itself was swampy had not been the impediment, as many had feared. What was Disney World but a reclaimed swamp? But you couldn’t invent more swamp to fill later on if you wanted to double the size of your park, and expansion was the name of the game. Plus the tax structure and regulations in Maine were more conducive to development, and given the fact that this resort was going to be basically a summer operation, the Maine demographics and climate also made more sense. There were
other
reasons for people to go to Maine, which had the ocean and L. L. Bean, whereas if they built in Bath they’d have to be
the
reason.
    The
Sentinel had
run an editorial right on the front page attacking this stated rationale for the developer’s eleventh-hour about-face. Normally, the
Schuyler Sentinel
wouldn’t have sympathized with the plight of its smaller neighbor, but this was different. The Ultimate Escape was to have been a boon for the entire region, not just Bath, and in a magnanimous gesture the editors of the newspaper had apparently decided that the whole region had been slighted, not just their neighbors. And for no good reason. The proposed site, they pointed out, had not become suddenly smaller than when negotiations began, nor had the tax structure and inadequate incentives the developers now complained of been raised as issues before. The location hadn’t changed, and neither had the climate. There was a resort town just up the road with a racetrack and baths and a summer concert series. What were the
real
reasons for the pullout? the
Sentinel
editorial had asked significantly, even hinting that the state of Maine might have greased a few palms. It also suggested that the decision had nothing to do with the cemetery controversy the Schuyler paper had done so much to publicize. No, it had to be something else.
    Clive Jr. knew the real reason, because he’d asked the same question of D. C. Collins of Escape Enterprises, who’d called him personally from Texas yesterday afternoon to apologize for the decision. “I know how hard you folks worked,” Collins admitted. “You did everything we asked.” Beyond which he hadn’t wanted to explain, and he wouldn’t have done so either if Clive Jr. hadn’t pleaded with the man so abjectly, not even bothering to conceal his personal frustration. “Well, okay,” Collins had finally agreed, “if you really want to know why, I’ll tell you. This is between you and me, though, and I’ll deny it later if I have to. But here’s the deal. Straight scoop. I’m the one made this decision, and I’ll tell you why. We’re looking to invest, what, about ninety million dollars. That’s a fair piece of change, Clive. It’s more than that. It’s an investment of time and material, and it doesn’t stop there. When we finally get the son of a bitch built, we’re going to hire a lot of people in the area. We have to do that, because we can’t afford ill will. We need a supportive environment. Now this is where I don’t want you to get me wrong. I know your people have all been cooperative. What I’m talking now has more to do with … what’s the word?… ambience. Here’s the deal. A lot of the people up in your neck of the woods behave funny. Hell, Clive, no offense, but they
look
funny.”
    Collins had paused to let this sink in. “You got yourself some real beautiful country up there, and I mean that. Nice trees especially. But you also got yourself some people who look like they live in trees, and that’s the cruel goddamn truth. We need a different ambience entirely. We need people who look more like people look in southern Maine. Massachusetts,really.” This is what it had come down to. People in Bath looked funny.
    At that moment a noisy garbage truck marked SQUEERS WASTE REMOVAL roared around the corner onto Main from Division