Pictures of Lily

him?
    ‘It’s nothing serious,’ Janine reassures me upon seeing my expression. ‘He got some food poisoning from something he ate last night.’
    But he ate the same thing as me and I feel fine.
    The next day is Saturday and it’s usually my day off, but as I’m going fishing with Ben on Sunday, I’ve arranged with Trudy to change my shift. My mum gives me a ride to work because Michael’s having a lie-in.
    I head straight to the koala lofts to see if Ben is there.
    ‘Is Ben still sick?’ I ask Janine.
    ‘No, he’s here,’ she tells me. ‘The vet’s coming in to check up on one of the wombats so Ben’s gone down to see him.’
    I get on with clearing the lofts and after an hour, I take a break and go to see Olivia.
    ‘Hey, you,’ I say gently as I open the hospital-room door to see our rapidly growing joey snuggled up amongst the blankets. She squeaks softly at the sight of me. I walk towards her and kneel down on the floor, lifting her up for a cuddle. I stroke her soft ears and she wraps a set of long black claws around my finger.
    How is Ben going to be able to bring himself to leave you? I silently ask. I notice there’s a burr caught up in the grey-white hair of one of her ears and I gently tug at it with my fingers, trying to pull it loose. ‘Wait here, little one, I’ll go and get a brush,’ I tell her soothingly as she looks at me with those warm brown eyes. I place her on her blankets and wander to the room next door, opening a cupboard in search of some grooming utensils. Suddenly I hear footsteps in the hospital room.
    ‘Pull it closed,’ Ben says to someone as I freeze on the spot.
    ‘You look like crap, mate,’ Dave replies as I hear the outside door to the hospital room shut.
    ‘I know.’ He sounds like crap, too. He’s obviously still feeling off colour.
    ‘Has anything happened with Charlotte?’
    Has it? I creep towards the door with the purpose of hiding behind it.
    Ben sighs wearily. ‘No.’
    Damn!
    ‘What’s up, then?’ Dave continues and I hold my breath, waiting for Ben’s explanation. It occurs to me that I probably should have revealed myself. Now I’ve got no choice but to eavesdrop.
    ‘It’s . . . kind of hard to talk about.’
    ‘Mate, we’ve known each other for ten years. You can talk to me about anything.’
    ‘I don’t think you’d understand this.’
    Hang on, hang on, what’s going on?
    ‘Try me.’
    Ben doesn’t say anything for a long time. Dave, thankfully, is patient as my mind races and I try to concentrate on breathing evenly so I don’t make a noise.
    ‘Have you ever . . . had feelings for . . .’ Ben’s words come with difficulty. And then he stops.
    ‘Go on,’ Dave urges.
    Yes, go on!
    ‘Forget it.’
    No! Wide-eyed, I peek through the crack in the door to see Ben sitting on one of the tables. His mate takes a seat next to him. I hide behind the door again, my heart pounding.
    ‘When I was getting married to Katherine,’ Dave starts, ‘I was terrified.’
    ‘It’s not that.’
    ‘Have you met someone else?’
    Silence.
    Now my head is pounding, too. I ask again, What’s going on ?
    ‘Do you love her?’ Dave asks.
    Who? Charlotte?
    ‘I don’t know,’ Ben replies eventually. ‘I’ve never been so fucking confused in my whole life.’
    ‘Do I know her?’
    Who? WHO?
    ‘You’ve met her.’
    Silence again.
    ‘Who is she?’
    White noise is rushing through my head. A tiny little voice inside asks, ‘Is he talking about me?’
    ‘I can’t tell you,’ Ben replies.
    When Dave speaks again, he speaks quietly. ‘I think I know who it is.’
    ‘I doubt it.’
    ‘Lily.’
    I stifle a gasp of shock. I can’t believe Dave has just said my name.
    Ben doesn’t confirm or deny it. His friend is the next person to speak and I wish I could stop the words that come out of his mouth.
    ‘I saw the way you were looking at each other the other night. I just had a feeling. Mate, you have to stop it.’
    ‘Nothing’s started.’
    ‘Well, it can’t do. Ever. She’s how old? Fifteen? Sixteen?’
    ‘Sixteen.’
    I feel faint.
    ‘Ben! Come on! She’s just a kid.’
    ‘She seems older.’
    ‘They all do at that age, but they’re not!’ Please stop talking. ‘Listen, I know you’re confused. Getting married is a big thing to do. But you and Charlotte are great together. It would break her heart if you called this thing off now.’ Dave continues with his words of so-called wisdom. ‘Lily is everything you feel