Princess Sultana's Circle

dead, I
thought, as I gave a tortured scream.
    Kareem rushed to my side.
“Sultana!”
    I leaned against Kareem’s
broad chest and began to weep.
    “ Sultana, Ali has been
asking for you,” Kareem told me.
    “ He is still with the
living?” I asked in amazement.
    “ He is—but you must be
brave. It seems his time has come.”
    I looked around the room
and saw that the crisis had spurred our family into a frenzy of
activity. Nura, Sara, and Haifa were busy chopping the leaves of
the ramram plant. Once ground, this substance would be made into a
tea, which Bedouins routinely use as an antidote for the poison of
venomous snakes. Yet, I knew that if Allah had determined this
particular day for Ali’s passing, nothing my sisters could do would
change his fate. All Muslims believe that each person’s fate is
determined at the beginning of time, and that no mortal man has the
capability to change or interfere with God’s plan.
    Ali cried out, “Oh Allah,
save me, I beg you!”
    Kareem led me to my
brother’s side. My heart seemed to plunge when I saw that Ali was
sweating profusely, and that his lips had turned blue. Indeed, it
appeared that my brother had only moments left to live.
    Ali’s wives moved aside,
and so I knelt down by Ali’s side.
    “ Ali,” I whispered. “It is
your sister, Sultana.”
    At first, there was no
response. Instead, Ali struggled to breathe.
    I squeezed his cold
hands.
    My brother turned his head
and opened his eyes, looking directly into my face. His own
expression was one of great sorrow. “Sultana?”
    “ Yes?” I braced myself for
an emotional moment. Surely, Ali was now going to apologize for his
life’s unsavory deeds. How could he die without first
acknowledging, and then expressing regret for the enormous pain he
had caused me, and other women?
    Just then, Nura came
rushing to Ali’s side. “Here,” she said in an urgent tone, “Ali,
open your mouth and swallow this.” Nura was holding a cup of the
tea made from the ramram plant. She held the cup to Ali’s
lips.
    As Ali drank the tea, Nura
whispered to him consolingly, telling him that he must try very
hard to live.
    “ Yes, I will try, Nura.”
Ali said determinedly. “I will try.”
    I, too, hoped that Ali
would not die. Possibly such a fright would make him become a
better father and husband, I reasoned.
    I waited at Ali’s side.
After a short time, he looked directly at me. He whispered,
“Sultana, is it you?”
    “ Yes, Ali.”
    “ Sultana, for sure, I will
be dead within moments.”
    I sighed deeply, not
wanting to argue with his words, should Ali’s death on this day be
God’s will. But when I looked closely at him, I saw that his lips
were not quite as blue as before. Perhaps the antidote was
working.
    Ali waited to see if I had
anything else to say. When I remained silent, he spoke once more.
“Sultana. Since I am on the way to the grave, I thought perhaps you
might have something important to say to me.”
    Confused, I sputtered,
“Well, Ali, I wish Allah’s kindness and blessings on
you.”
    “ Oh?” Ali’s face fell in
disappointment.
    What did my brother want
from me?
    Haltingly, Ali spoke once
more. “Sultana, I thought perhaps you would wish to apologize to
me.”
    In my surprise, my voice
rose higher than I intended. “Apologize?”
    Ali looked positively
stricken at my response, yet by the sound of his voice, I could
tell that he was gaining strength. “Yes,” he said, “Sultana, you
should apologize for your wicked behavior. You have tormented me
for all of my life.”
    So! Ali’s renewed strength
had brought back his arrogance! I was so shocked at this unexpected
turn that I began to stammer once again, “I have nothing to
apologize about, Ali! In truth, I was waiting to hear your
apology!”
    Ali gave me a long, stony
look. Finally, he whispered, “I have done no harm. I have been an
excellent father to my children, a good husband to my wives, an
obedient son to my father, and a supportive brother to my sisters.
What is there to apologize for?”
    I could only stare at my
brother in despair. Did he truly believe the words he spoke? I
quickly decided that my brother was actually helpless when it came
to recognizing his own evil! Quite simply, Ali did not have the
capacity to think like a normal human being. Ali truly believed
that it was I who was the wicked sinner!
    At that moment, I had to
curb my tongue or I would curse Ali. Although driven by a fierce
passion, I did