Rainfall

fine.”

    “I’ll take the couch,” she said, with a smile that lingered.

    I wound up accepting her offer, but my sleep was restless. I dreamed I was moving though dense jungle near Tchepone in southern Laos, hunted by an NVA counter-recon battalion. I had become separated from my team and was disoriented. I would sideslip and double back, but couldn’t shake the NVA. They had me surrounded, and I knew I was going to be captured and tortured. Then Midori was there, trying to get me to take a side arm. “I don’t want to be captured,” she was saying. “Please, help me. Take the gun. Don’t worry about me. Save my Yards.”

    I snapped upright, my body coiled like a spring.
Easy, John. Just a dream
. I tightened my abdomen and forced a long hiss of air out through my nostrils, feeling like Crazy Jake was right there in the room with me.

    My face was wet and I thought it was bleeding again, but when I put my hand to my cheek and looked at my fingers I realized that it was tears.
What the hell is this
? I thought.

    The moon was low in the sky, its light flowing in through the window. Midori was sitting up on the couch, her knees drawn to her chest. “Bad dream?” she asked.

    I flicked my thumb across the sides of my face. “How long have you been up?”

    She shrugged. “Awhile. You were tossing and turning.”

    “I say anything?”

    “No. Are you afraid of what you might say in your sleep?”

    I looked at her, one side of her face illuminated by moonlight, the other hidden in shadow. “Yes,” I said.

    “What was the dream?” she asked.

    “I don’t know,” I said, lying. “Mostly just images.”

    I could feel her looking at me. “You tell me to trust you,” she said, “but you won’t even tell me about a bad dream.”

    I started to answer, then all at once felt irritated with her. I slid off the bed and walked over to the bathroom.

    I don’t need her questions,
I thought.
I don’t need to take care of her. Fucking CIA, Holtzer, knows I’m in Tokyo, knows where I live. I’ve got enough problems.

    She was the key, I knew. Her father must have told her something. Or she had what whoever had broken into his apartment on the day of his funeral had been looking for. Why couldn’t she just realize what the hell it was?

    I walked back into the bedroom and stood facing her. “Midori, you’ve got to try harder. You’ve got to remember. Your father must have told you something, or given you something.”

    I saw surprise on her face. “I told you, he didn’t.”

    “Someone broke into his apartment after he died.”

    “I know. I got a call from the police when it happened.”

    “The point is, they couldn’t find what they were looking for, and they think you have it.”

    “Look, if you want to take a look around my father’s apartment, I can let you in. I haven’t cleaned it out yet, and I still have the key.”

    The people who had broken in had come up empty, and my old friend Tatsu, as thorough a man as I have ever known, had been there afterward with the resources of the Keisatsucho. I knew another look would be a dead end, and her suggestion only served to increase my frustration.

    “That’s not going to help. What would these people think that you have? The disk? Something it’s hidden in? A key? Are you sure you don’t have anything?”

    I saw her redden slightly. “I told you, I don’t.”

    “Well, try to remember something, can’t you?”

    “No, I can’t,” she said, her voice angry. “How can I remember something if I don’t have it?”

    “How can you be sure you don’t have it if you can’t remember it?”

    “Why are you saying this? Why don’t you believe me?”

    “Because nothing else makes sense! And I’ve got to tell you, I don’t like the feeling of people trying to kill me when I don’t even know why!”

    She swung her feet to the floor and stood up. “Oh, it’s only you! Do you think I like it? I didn’t do anything! And I don’t know why these people are doing this, either!”

    I exhaled slowly, trying to rein in my anger. “It’s because they think you have the damn disk. Or you know where it is.”

    “Well, I don’t!
Oai nikusama! Mattaku kokoroattari ga nai wa yo! Mo nan do mo so itteru ja nai yo
!” I don’t know anything! I’ve already told you that!

    We stood staring at each other at the foot of the bed, breathing hard. Then she said, “You don’t give a shit about me. You’re just after what they