Rant

me, the first sign was finding public bathrooms locked at night. Pretty soon, a lot of public drinking fountains stopped running except in the daytime. Daytimers staked out the bathrooms and restaurants and drinking fountains they wanted, and Nighttimers had to settle for the rest. The segregation only got worse as the rabies epidemic spread.
    The twelve hours we spent on the backside of the planet, if you ask me, the night turned into just another kind of ghetto.
    Neddy Nelson: Do you have any idea how sweet the sunset looks after you’ve been sweating and bleeding, pissing yourself, in the backseat of a wrecked car all day? Can you imagine how sweet those sirens sound at evening curfew?
    Galton Nye: We used to hear stories in Bible-study group, how these so-called Droolers would try to spit in your mouth. The way Nighttimers carry on, they only protest so loud so their spit flies in your eyes or into your food. I’m talking about intentional high-risk conduct.
    My heart goes out, but I say, sooner or later, the quarantine had to start.
    28–Embedded Commands
    Wallace Boyer ( Car Salesman): Remember, car buyers will fall into one of the three learning styles: visual, auditory, or kinetic.
    Talk to Echo Lawrence, for example, and her eyes are rolled up, looking at the ceiling. Every other sentence out of her mouth is “The way I see it…” or “Watch out for that bitch Tina Something…” To pace Echo, you only have to look up when you think. Do it subtly, but bunch up the fingers on your left hand to mimic hers. Speed up until your breathing is forty, maybe fifty breaths per minute. Blink your eyes at least thirty blinks every minute.
    Always remember: The person asking the questions is the person in control. The way to get that huge, impossible yes is to pile up a mountain of small, easy yeses. A good salesman starts by asking what’re called tie-down and add-on questions; these are questions such as “Do you want to make your wife happy?” or “Is your child’s safety important to you?” Ask questions people have to answer with a surefire “yes.” Ask: “Is gas mileage important to you?” and “Do you want a reliable car?” Just keep piling up those small yeses. The more any customer says yes, the more “pliable” they become.
    Another kind of questions are called “control questions,” such as: “Do you like light colors or dark colors?” Or “Are you looking for a car or truck?” Control questions include the only answers the customer can give. You’re limiting the answers to the options you give. Two-door or four-door? Convertible or hardtop? Do you want leather or cloth seats?
    And when a person says, “Hold on,” or “Listen up,” that’s called an “embedded command.” To sell cars, you use embedded commands all day long. For example:
    “Would you just look at the two-tone paint job on that beauty?” “Treat yourself. Just feel that leather upholstery.”
    “Wow, would you listen to that stereo!”
    If you pay attention to Echo Lawrence, half of what comes out of her mouth is embedded commands.
    Control questions, tie-down questions, and embedded commands—that’s how a good salesman coaxes you to open up. You pace Shot Dunyun by wiping your lips with the back of your hand while you talk. Cross your arms over your chest and flop your head from one shoulder to the other. Say “What I heard is…” and “Word on the street says…” Convince Shot you’re an auditory learner. Listen for him to introduce “doors”: those little glimpses into his personal life. His dog, for example. His pug dog. And remember, he’ll look side to side as he thinks about how his dog died.
    But if Shot Dunyun looks at his right ear—he’s lying.
    For now, remember: Echo Lawrence is visual. Shot Dunyun is auditory. Neddy Nelson is kinetic. In that last sentence, the word “remember” is an embedded command.
    To repeat, the way you get to the huge, impossible yes is, you start collecting a lot of easy, small yeses.
    27–Tree Night
    From the Field Notes of Green Taylor Simms ( Historian): Following enormous deliberation, we chose to use a real tree. We decided on a noble fir. Festooned in blue lights, and crowned with a glowing blue star. Fastened lengthwise along the roof of the Cadillac Seville, the tree resembled a blue comet: the big star bobbing above the windshield, trailing hundreds of dazzling blue sparks behind it.
    Neddy Nelson ( Party Crasher): Do you think I’m an