Red Phoenix

kissed the top of her head.
    Leo sat next to John, his face grim.
    John leaned his arms on the table and studied his hands. ‘I’m sorry, Simone, we thought you were too young to know, so we didn’t tell you. Now that Emma and Leo are here, I’ll tell you everything.’
    Simone sniffled. She didn’t reply.
    ‘You saw that I only have a limited time. That’s right. Even with Aunty Kwan filling me with energy, I will lose it all eventually and I’ll have to go.’
    Simone shook once with a huge gasping sob, then went still.
    ‘I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, sweetheart, but I promised Emma I’ll come back for her. So that means that I’ll come back for you too.’
    Simone’s voice was tiny. ‘You don’t know how long you’ll be gone?’
    He shook his head. ‘I’m sorry, darling.’
    ‘Why don’t you just go to the Mountain and take me with you?’
    ‘I can’t. Firstly, most of the Mountain is gone, and it’ll take a long time to rebuild. There’s no power there for me until I come back and put it there. It’s gone.’
    She nodded and sniffled again. She understood.
    ‘Second, a child can only enter the Celestial Plane with protection. The protection of the child’s mother. You can’t go there because your mother is dead. You can’t go until you’re grown-up.’
    ‘I can go with Emma,’ Simone said firmly, grabbing my hand and clutching it. ‘She’s like my mother.’
    John looked me in the eyes and smiled. My heart twisted. He turned back to Simone. ‘I wish I could take both of you.’
    ‘I’ll have Leo and Emma to look after me when you go. We’ll wait for you together,’ Simone said.
    Leo sighed, then ran his hand over his head and dropped his hand onto the table. ‘Do you know what AIDS is, Simone?’ he said gently.
    Simone nodded. ‘Emma told me about that,’ she said, her little face serious. ‘It’s a bad disease. If you catch it, you die. Every time. It takes a long time for you to die, but you always die.’
    Leo smiled gratefully and I nodded.
    ‘I have that, Simone. Your dad is keeping me alive. When he’s gone…’ his voice thickened and his speech slurred even more, ‘I’m going to die.’
    ‘You’re both going?’
    Leo and John both nodded.
    ‘That’s why you got Michael, isn’t it?’ Simone said. ‘I hate him!’
    ‘Don’t hate Michael, sweetheart,’ Leo said. ‘I chose him. He’s the best person to do my job when I’m gone.’
    Simone’s voice was cruel. ‘I hate you, Daddy. I hate you, Leo. I hate Emma, I hate Michael, I hate everybody !’ She started to sob and I turned her around in my arms to hold her. ‘I hate the world !’ she wailed into my chest.
    I let her cry for a while. She needed to let it out of her system. Leo and John sat quietly and waited for her as well.
    When she had stopped sobbing she sat very still and silent, her head on my chest. ‘Are you okay, sweetheart?’ I said.
    She didn’t move or speak.
    Do you think I should get her professional counselling? John said silently. ‘Get Ms Kwan,’ I said.
    ‘I hate Ms Kwan,’ Simone said, her voice muffled by my shirt. Her little arms clutched me tighter. ‘I hate her.’
    Kwan Yin appeared next to me. ‘Come with me, Simone,’ she said softly. She held out her hand to Simone.
    Simone moved away slightly and clutched me even tighter. ‘Go away.’
    ‘I have something to show you.’ Ms Kwan’s hand didn’t move from next to me. ‘Would you like to see my Garden?’
    Simone lifted her head off my chest to look at Ms Kwan. ‘No.’ She dropped her head again, looking away. ‘Go away.’
    ‘Would you like to see my Garden, Emma?’ Ms Kwan said kindly. ‘Would you like to come and see it?’
    ‘There is nothing I’d like more, Lady,’ I said. ‘Can an ordinary person like me go?’
    ‘The Garden is for ordinary people like you,’ Ms Kwan said, amused. ‘It’s the ordinary people who need it the most.’
    ‘Can I go, Simone?’ I said to the little tawny head on my chest. ‘Will you be all right with Leo and your dad?’
    ‘If you leave me here without you I will never talk to you again,’ Simone said thickly. ‘I won’t let you go without me.’
    ‘Well then, you’ll have to come, won’t you?’ I said gently. ‘Let’s go and have a look at Aunty Kwan’s Garden.’
    Simone nodded into my chest without saying anything. I reached out and took Ms Kwan’s hand.
    Take your time, John said as we disappeared. The last thing I saw were