Rook

today’s large bodyguards,” said Ingrid brightly.
    “Where’s the coffee?”
    “Oh, there’s no coffee,” said Ingrid. “The doctors said it was best for you not to have anything to eat or drink until after the tests.”
    “But… but didn’t you say there would be breakfast when I got down?”
    “That was just to lure you out of bed,” said Ingrid. Myfanwy thought briefly of bursting into tears, but instead nodded a weary assent.
    “I’m going to need a replacement phone,” said Myfanwy flatly, dropping her slime-encrusted mobile on the desk. Ingrid eyed it silently as some of the vile liquid began to ooze onto her blotter. An infinite number of awkward questions hovered in the air, begging to be asked, and Myfanwy wondered how her executive assistant was going to address this.
    “Consider it done, Rook Thomas,” her secretary said finally. “Now, did you shower?”
    “Yeah, but someone had taken all my soap and shampoo,” said Myfanwy.
    “Yes, that’s because they’ll be comparing your scent to preserved ampoules of your sweat,” said Ingrid.
    “Groovy.” She glanced over as two bespectacled men came into the office, looking expectant.
    “Now, Rook Thomas, this is Dr. Burke and Dr. Leichhardt.” The two doctors both had mustaches and looked like photo negatives of each other. They bowed awkward little bows, which she acknowledged with a nod and a yawn.
    “Good morning, gentlemen. Now, I sincerely hope that I’m not going to have to do anything difficult this morning?” she asked, trying to open her eyes.
    “Pardon me, Rook Thomas?” asked Dr. Burke.
    “I won’t be, you know, running laps or anything, right?”
    “Oh, no, Rook Thomas,” said Dr. Leichhardt. “Our tests are quite passive on your part. Although I feel I should warn you, some of them are quite—”
    “Unpleasant, time-consuming, and highly intrusive, I know,” interrupted Myfanwy. She turned to Ingrid. “Didn’t I ask to have these done in the afternoon?” she said piteously.
    “Security Chief Clovis randomly reassigned the appointments,” said Ingrid as they walked to the lift. “He seemed to feel that randomness was the key to preventing the Grafters from evading our detection methods.”
    From what I’ve seen,
thought Myfanwy,
the Grafters are pretty comfortable with randomness,
but she restrained herself from saying anything. “And is Security Chief Clovis awake and at work at this hour?” she asked bitterly.
    “Oh, no,” said Ingrid, pushing the button for the medical floor.
    The doors opened and the two doctors ushered Myfanwy, Ingrid, and the two large bodyguards into the medical center. “And weren’t there supposed to be three doctors? To ensure something?”
    “Yes, and here is Dr. Wills,” said Ingrid, introducing a tall icy blond woman, who was pulling on a pair of latex gloves that reached up to the elbow.
    “Good morning, Rook Thomas,” said Dr. Wills without a trace of a smile. “Please take off your pajamas and slippers, put on this paper gown, get on this bed, and put your feet in these stirrups.” Myfanwy nodded with a deep lack of enthusiasm and looked around for a place to change. The three doctors looked at her expectantly,and she had a grim realization. Ingrid at least had the decency to look away. The large bodyguards tactfully stepped outside to take up positions guarding the door.
Maybe it’s better I didn’t get any coffee,
she thought.
This isn’t something I would want to be fully awake for.
Someone would pay for this.
    “Well, gentlemen, shall we get started?” said Dr. Wills, “Ingrid, would you like some coffee?” Myfanwy narrowed her eyes.
    Someone was
definitely
going to pay.
    I ngrid, I need to know if—ow ow
ow ow!
What the hell are you doing down there?”
    “Sorry, Rook Thomas” came an unrepentant voice from between her legs. The two doctors flanking Dr. Wills smiled apologetically.
    “Not as much as you’re going to be,” she muttered to herself, and she beckoned Ingrid over to her. “Ingrid,” she said quietly, so none of the audience could hear, “could you check my schedule for the past six months? I need to know if I had any meetings with a Graaf Ernst von Suchtlen.”
    “Now, Rook Thomas?”
    “Please.” Ingrid nodded and turned away to scan through records on her tablet computer. Myfanwy yawned, and then gave a little shriek.
    “Sorry, Rook Thomas. Your body tenses when you yawn,” said Dr. Wills. Myfanwy looked down at her