Sea Haven 02 - Spirit Bound
wasn’t trying to attack you. I just meant that feeling again, waking up as a woman is amazing, and I know you felt this way at least once. This is my time. Maybe my only time.”
She studied Blythe’s averted face and made her confession in a little rush. “I was such an innocent when I met Jean-Claude, so silly, mistaking his lifestyle and strength for the real thing. I was so impressed with him and I thought the sun rose and set with him. I didn’t pay attention to what he really was, just with what I thought he was, building a fantasy man in my head that didn’t exist. I didn’t even understand what love was back then.”
Blythe turned her head and Judith could see her face was streaked with tears. “It’s okay, Judith. I always fall apart around this time of year. It really has nothing to do with you.”
“I’m just so embarrassed that I let a man like Jean-Claude into my life when I should have known better. All the warning signs were there, they were, Blythe. I didn’t want to see them. I heard whispers and I ignored them. I saw the look on some people’s faces and alarms would go off in my head, but I didn’t stop. I just kept on with my ridiculous fantasy. And when it all came crumbling down, that precious princess in her golden tower dream, I couldn’t even handle it myself.”
Judith sank back down onto the bed and gripped the intricate footboard. “I made such a mess out of so many people’s lives and got my brother murdered in the process. That should have been me, not him. I guess I don’t deserve to feel this way, do I?”
“Judith!” Blythe swung around. “Don’t you ever say that again. Do you think Rikki doesn’t deserve happiness with Levi?”
“She was innocent. She didn’t start the fires that killed her parents and her fiancé.”
“And you aren’t any more responsible for your brother’s death, or even what happened to any of the others involved.”
Judith gripped the footboard tighter. “Really? Do you really believe that, Blythe? It was my emotions swinging so far out of control that provoked all those people.”
“You had no idea you were a spirit element. You’d never even heard the term before, let alone known what it was or how it worked. You didn’t know anything about psychic gifts or how to contain or use them properly. Of course your emotions were intense. Your brother was tortured and murdered in front of you. Did you think you’d be gentle Judith, smiling sweetly at the men who had committed such an atrocity? That isn’t even reasonable.”
“I guess none of us are very reasonable when it comes to our own lives. I say that very same thing to you, Blythe, yet you still take responsibility for your stepfather and mother’s deaths.” Judith flashed a wan smile. “But of course, for you, that’s different.”
Blythe sent an answering smile back. “Of course. Every time I think we’ve all come so far, this time of year rolls around and throws you—and me—right back into a depression, wallowing in guilt and sorrow.”
“And then I have to meet Thomas Vincent. Poor innocent man, walks into the big mess of our lives. I guess we’re all just holding it together by a thread. Inviting a stranger into our lives even for an afternoon probably isn’t very fair. I didn’t think it through.” She bit down on her lower lip. “Maybe I should I call him.”
Blythe shook her head. “I think we can accommodate Mr. Vincent. Lexi won’t mind. She’s been saying she wanted to take a day off to read up on the temperatures needed in the greenhouse for some exotic plant she wants to grow.”
Judith couldn’t help but laugh. “That’s our Lexi. She doesn’t have enough plants or enough forest to play in, she has to bring the jungle to Sea Haven.”
“I love her so much,” Blythe said. “I ache for her sometimes.”
Judith nodded. “Me too. I think we all do. She’s thriving here though.”
“She hides from the world,” Blythe pointed out.
Judith laid a comforting hand on Blythe’s shoulder. “We’re all hiding from the world, Blythe,” she said gently. “Those gates make us feel safe here and none of us wants to venture too far out of our comfort zone.”
Blythe frowned. “You’re so right, Judith. No wonder I had such a reaction to you bringing a man here, I wanted our safe little world to remain intact. That’s the same reason we were all upset when Rikki found Levi.”
It was Judith’s turn to frown. “Not exactly.
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