Soul Beach

smiles.
    But as I turn the corner into our street, I see a man sitting on our garden wall. It must be a journalist. Actually, that suits me fine. There’s nothing more likely to cheer me up than the chance to mouth off at some creepy reporter.
    It’s only once the guy sees me, and stands up, that I realise it’s Lewis.
    ‘Are you stalking me?’
    He stands up. Or should I say unfolds himself? He’s taller than I remembered. ‘I may be a geek, but I’m not a sex pest.’
    Despite – or maybe because of – everything that’s happened today, that makes me smile, but I try to stay stern. ‘So what are you doing here?’
    ‘I promised Robbie I’d have another go.’
    ‘What, have you got super-human powers or something?’
    He smiles. ‘It has been said. But, admittedly, not by women. He’s worried about you.’
    ‘Yeah. So worried that he dumped me.’
    Now he looks at me, but sideways. ‘From what he told me, it was more like you didn’t leave him much choice.’
    Was it?
    ‘How long have you been hanging around? The neighbours are really pissed off with us for attracting so many undesirables. First the police. Then the press. Now you. You’re at high risk of being given an ASBO.’
    ‘I’ve been here an hour or so. Thought I’d catch you on your way home from school. But seems you’re running a bit late . . .’ he gives me a meaningful look. He knows I’ve bunked off. What else might he know? ‘I could do with a glass of water, or something.’
    I sigh, and unlock the front door. ‘Mum?’ I call out, but there’s no reply. I glance at him and leave the door open long enough for him to come in.
    He follows me into the kitchen, and I take a glass off the draining board and fill it with lukewarm tap water. He takes it off me, but doesn’t drink.
    ‘So what part of I don’t need any help didn’t you understand last week?’
    Lewis frowns. ‘I understood. I just didn’t believe you.’
    ‘Oh.’
    He pulls out one of the stools and sits down at the breakfast bar. He seems even bigger in here, more confident. ‘I knew your sister. A bit.’
    ‘So what? Half of Britain thinks they knew my sister.’
    ‘Fair point. But, you know, we were in the same year, our circles intersected each other. Like in a Venn diagram.’
    ‘You weren’t kidding about being a geek, were you? So were you friends?’
    ‘Not exactly. Admired her from afar, like most of the guys round here. She grabbed what she could from her life. She’d have hated to see you like this, withdrawing from life, turning your back on your mates.’
    Shows what you know, I think. Meggie and I know that what really matters is sisterhood. ‘I’m not.’
    ‘Robbie thinks you are. So does Cara. That’s two against one. Geeks like me know that the numbers never lie.’
    God, he’s persistent. ‘Supposing I was finding it hard, what exactly do you think you can do about it? Are you going to bring her back from the dead?’
    ‘Cara tells me someone’s already done that.’
    I stare at him. I wish I’d never said anything to Cara; I don’t want to run the risk of anyone getting anywhere near the truth. The best that might happen is that he’ll think I’m a crazy person who hears voices or something. The worst is that he could take me seriously.
    ‘I got one stupid prank email. It’s nothing.’
    ‘Just one?’ He knows I’m lying.
    ‘OK, a couple. And when they arrived, I was in a state because of the funeral, so for a day or two, I did think they were real. But obviously it’s complete rubbish. I am moving on, but at my own pace, and everyone’s going to have to be a bit more patient with me.’
    Lewis looks at me, his dark hair hiding part of his face. I can’t work out if he’s genuinely shy behind all the bluff, or whether he’s actually a poseur.
    ‘What?’ I say, when he stays silent.
    ‘I’m not sure I believe you, Alice. But I guess it is your business, if you want to handle it on your own. If you think you can . . .’
    Can I? The alternative is to trust someone else, like I tried to with the neurotic Sahara this afternoon, and look what happened then. I shudder. ‘I can,’ I tell him. ‘Thanks for caring, though.’
    He looks like he’s about to say something else to me, but then he stands up. ‘Fair enough. Thanks for the water.’ It’s untouched on the worktop. ‘You don’t need to see me out.’
    I wait till I hear the front door close. Alone again. I expect to feel relieved, but I’m