Soul Fire

her, instead of me?
    After a minute or so, Danny climbs out of the hut too. He has to crouch to fit his powerful body through the doorway. I think he’s heading for our rock.
    I give him a head start, then squirm out of my hiding place. As I walk towards the edge of the Beach, I wonder whether it’s better to tell him what I heard, or to pretend
everything’s good. When I reach him, he smiles up at me, as though he already knows I was there.
    ‘Hey, Danny.’
    ‘Hey, beautiful.’
    I blush. I always blush when he says that, because it isn’t true. ‘I’m sorry I haven’t been around much. It’s been a strange time.’
    He says nothing, but keeps looking into my eyes. I look away first.
    ‘I’ve been busy in my world. It’s just a phase, though. It doesn’t mean I love you any less, Danny.’
    ‘No?’ He looks up at the sky. ‘Are you having doubts? About us?’
    ‘Not about you. Sometimes I worry about what happens next. If Meggie . . . goes, will I go too?’
    Danny shrugs. ‘I hate the idea, but I understand if you want to end this now, Alice. You have a life to live. Maybe I am stopping you from doing that.’
    I look at those hands, that neck, those lips, and I know that I can’t turn my back on him.
    ‘I love you, though, Danny.’
    ‘And I love you too, Alice. So much. But the longer we spend together, the worse it will be if we’re separated forever. Logic says I should let you go.’
    ‘Logic?’
    ‘And fairness.’
    ‘You could do that? End it? For my sake?’
    ‘I . . .’
    When I look into his eyes, they’re guarded. But the idea of never looking into them again . . .
    ‘Logic and fairness and common sense. They’re words, Danny. They can’t compete with how it feels to be here, with you. I don’t want to end this. I can’t.’
    He doesn’t look up straight away but I can see he’s scowling. I freeze. Maybe an end to this is what he wants, after all. But then he stands up, and leans in to kiss me, and I see
his eyes are wet.
    ‘I was kidding myself too. I couldn’t have borne it if . . . No, I can’t even say it aloud. Just come here. Now.’
    We fall into each other’s arms, a little unsteady. The sharp edge of the rock scrapes against my leg but I hardly feel it. We’re together again. This is how things are meant to
be.

32
    ‘Bar-ce-LONA, la, la, la, la, la. BAR-cel-ona, la, la, la, la, LA, LA, LAAAAA!’
    I think Cara might be quite excited.
    She’s staying over before Dad drives us to Gatwick tomorrow, but at this rate, neither of us will get any sleep.
    ‘I definitely think Ade’s noticed me already, don’t you, Alice?’
    ‘Probably.’
    ‘No, it’s not probably, it’s definitely.’
    ‘Then why ask me?’
    ‘Spoilsport!’
    I’m beginning to wish she hadn’t come to stay.
    ‘You will be careful, though, won’t you?’ I say. ‘Just because you could have Ade, doesn’t mean you have to go through with it. You don’t always have
to be the kid in the sweetshop.’
    ‘Why else would I be going?’
    I try not to snap back, but it’s hard. ‘Um, because you want to explore one of Europe’s most exciting capitals? To learn Spanish? To spend some quality time with your best
friend?’
    I’m not in any position to lecture her; my own motives are hardly straightforward.
    Cara goes silent and I wonder if she’s sulking. But after a couple of minutes her breathing changes, and I realise she’s finally fallen asleep.
    It’s two fifteen a.m. We have to get up in two hours, but before that, there’s something I need to do. I could try going online under the duvet, but Cara’s a light sleeper. She
always says it’s so she knows if a guy is trying to sneak off in the night. Sometimes I wonder why my best friend acts so strangely and whether it might be because I’ve not been there
for her enough.
    After Spain, it’ll be different. It has to be.
    I carry my laptop downstairs. Since I’ve been allowed back online in my own room, visiting the Beach has felt less exciting. Being here in the dining room, where I could be found out,
brings some of the edginess back.
    It’s darker on the Beach than it is outside. In my world, this weekend is the summer solstice, so it never seems to get completely dark. But there’s no moon on the Beach tonight, and
someone has laid out more of those Chinese lanterns across the sand, glowing pink and purple. In the distance, I hear singing: strange melodies, from unfamiliar instruments. It could be