Spencerville

How should I play this, Keith?”
    “Let’s try honesty this time.”
    “Okay. I love you. I’ve always loved you.”
    “I love you and always have. That’s why I came back. I can’t get you out of my mind.”
    “I curse the day I let you go.”
    “You didn’t. I left. I should have asked you to marry me.” He looked at her. “What would you have said?”
    “I’d have said no.”
    “Why?”
    “Because you wanted to go. You were bored, Keith. You watched your friends go off to war, you were obsessed with the war news on TV. I saw that. And you wanted other women.”
    “No.”
    “Keith.”
    “Well… wanting and doing are two different things.”
    “I know, and you would never have cheated on me, and you’d resent a life without some sexual adventure. God, Keith, everyone else was doing it with everyone else, except us.”
    He tried to make a joke and said, “I’m not too sure about you.”
    She smiled, then said, “Can I be honest? I wanted to try other men. We both wanted to experiment, but we couldn’t because we had an understanding, a commitment. We were two country kids, crazy in love, having sex and feeling guilty about it, but wanting other people and feeling even more guilty about that. I mean, in some ways, we were more than married.”
    “I think you’re right.” He smiled. “So you wanted other men?”
    “Sometimes. Am I blushing?”
    “A little.” He thought a moment, then asked, “What should we have done?”
    “We didn’t have to do anything. The world did it for us. To us.”
    “I suppose. But why didn’t we get together again?”
    “You couldn’t accept the other men.”
    “No, I couldn’t. And you?”
    “Women are different. I just wanted you to get it out of your system.”
    “Well, I have.”
    “Me, too.” She added, “I’ve never had an affair.”
    “I don’t care if you have. You deserved one.”
    “No, listen to me. I’m hopelessly old-fashioned. But in your case, Mr. Landry, I’ll make an exception.”
    “Well… I’d like nothing more right now. But… we have to understand the consequences if we—”
    “Keith, I don’t give a damn about the consequences. We’ve cleared up the past, and that’s all we had to do. Make love to me now, and the hell with the future.”
    He took her arm and led her toward the stairs, his heart pounding, afraid the phone would ring, afraid it wouldn’t.
    He didn’t even remember how he got into the bedroom, but there they were with the lamp on. She looked nervous, he thought, and he said, “Do you want a drink?”
    “No, I want to do this with a clear head.” She looked around the room. “We did it here once when your family was out visiting.”
    “Right. I pretended I was sick and stayed home.”
    She didn’t seem to hear him and kept looking around, then looked into one of the wardrobes, which he noticed was open. He could see, and she could see, the hanging holster, the bulletproof vest, the sword, the uniforms, and the M-16 rifle. She turned to him but made no remark, except, “I see you know how to keep a room tidy.”
    “I’m a tidy bachelor.”
    They stood awkwardly, facing each other, and they seemed to have run out of small talk. She pulled her turtleneck out of her jeans and said, “Well, I’ll break the ice.” She pulled the sweater over her head and threw it aside, then unhooked her bra, slipped it off, and let it drop to the floor. “Okay?” She held out her hands, and he took them. She put his hands on her breasts, and he caressed them, feeling her nipples harden.
    She reached out and unbuttoned his shirt, then ran her hands over his chest. “You feel the same, Keith.”
    “You, too.”
    She pressed her breasts against his chest, and they kissed while she slipped his shirt off. Still kissing, she undid her jeans and pulled them with her panties down to her thighs. She directed his hand between her legs, and he felt her pubic hair, then her vagina, which was moist.
    She moved back and sat on the bed, pulling off her shoes, socks, jeans, and panties. Completely naked now, she looked at him and smiled. “Is this really happening?”
    “My God, Annie, you are beautiful.”
    She suddenly stood and threw her arms around him. “I love you.”
    He picked her up and carried her back to the bed, laying her on the quilt with her legs over the foot of the bed, then he bent over her and kissed her breasts, her stomach, then he knelt and ran his tongue down to the soft inside of her