Tales of the City 08 - Mary Ann in Autumn

about it, he whispered to Mary Ann: “That’s what it was, right?”
    She nodded.
    He signed off and sat down next to her on the couch. She rolled over and began weeping against his shoulder, softly at first then with a ferocity that caught him off guard. She was like one of those old Greek ladies who fling themselves on coffins.
    “It’s okay,” he told her, stroking her hair. “You’re safe now. Jake’s got you. It’s gonna be all right.”
    He was getting used to this man thing.

Chapter 36
Bad Juju
    T hey had given her a sedative. She had asked for one, in fact. She was tired of being brave, and oblivion had had a lot going for it at the time. When she woke up in Michael and Ben’s bed, the house was full of familiar faces: Michael, Ben, Jake, even Shawna, who’d brought Mrs. Madrigal with her as soon as they’d heard the news. Mary Ann thought of Michael’s Wizard of Oz joke when Roman pulled out of his epileptic seizure: “And you were there, and you, and you …” Roman himself was there, in fact, curled up next to her feet on the bed. He’d had something of a trauma himself.
    What struck her as peculiar was how remorseful they all seemed. Ben, after all, had not known the history of the old man in the dog park, and Michael had never met “Cliff,” so therefore could not possibly have identified him as Norman. Shawna, of course, had less reason than anyone to feel responsible, since she hadn’t even been born the first time Norman “died.” She’d been totally in the dark about everything.
    “I’m so sorry,” Mary Ann told her after the others had left for the living room.
    “For what?” asked Shawna.
    “This whole mess. You don’t deserve to have this nightmare laid on you.”
    “Actually,” said Shawna. “I laid it on myself.”
    This made no sense to Mary Ann. “In what way?” she asked.
    Shawna sat down on the edge of the bed. “You don’t follow my blog, do you?”
    Mary Ann shook her head. “Not a lot, no. I’m sorry.” She wanted to explain that the brazenly frank subject matter bothered her because she still thought of Shawna as her little girl, but she knew, better than anyone, that she had long ago forfeited the right to say that. “ Should I have been reading it?”
    “It might have helped,” her daughter replied with an odd little smile.
    “I don’t get it.”
    Shawna was fidgeting. “I’ve been more involved than you think.”
    “You’re scaring me now.”
    “No … please … don’t. It’s all good. I’d just rather you read it when you’re feeling stronger. Anna told me about the cancer. I’m glad you’re kicking its ass.”
    “Thanks, Puppy.” Shawna’s baby name had just tumbled out unconsciously. “Do people still call you that? Besides your dad.”
    Shawna shook her head. “He’s never called me that, actually. He said that’s what you called me.”
    She doesn’t even remember , thought Mary Ann. “Would you mind if I still do?”
    “If that’s what you want. Sure.”
    An awkward silence.
    “They told you about me and Bob, I guess.”
    Shawna nodded. “For what’s it’s worth … I think it’s for the best. I think you’re gonna make a sick single lady.”
    Robbie also used the word “sick” in a complimentary way, but Mary Ann had never gotten used to it. As she basked in her daughter’s smile she realized, with a sense of completely undeserved relief, that Shawna wasn’t doing that awful snood thing anymore. “I love your hair,” she told her. “That’s a nice cut.”
    Shawna smiled. “It’s sort of yours, isn’t it?”
    As if to confirm this, Mary Ann touched the side of her own head. “I guess you’re right.”
    “It wasn’t intentional.”
    “No … I’m sure.”
    “I didn’t mean it like that.”
    “I know, Puppy. There’s not a mean bone in your body.”
    Shawna, surprisingly, reached out and took her hand. “I know this sounds funny, but … I think this was all for a reason. I think it was meant to bring us together.”
    Mary Ann rolled her eyes. “Facebook might have been easier.”
    “No … seriously … we had all the pieces all along. We just needed to talk to each other.” Shawna paused, studying Mary Ann’s reaction. “Do I sound like a total flake?”
    Mary Ann shook her head. “You just sound like Anna.”
    “Well … duh.”
    Mary Ann smiled. Mrs. Madrigal had left her imprint, all right.
    “Tell me something, Puppy … did you talk to the police?”
    Shawna nodded. “We