The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared

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    ‘You will not encounter a more magnificent bible experience than this, Mr Prosecutor,’ said Bosse Ljungberg with conviction. ‘Would you allow me to present you with a copy? We must all seek the light, Mr Prosecutor!’
    Unlike the others, Bosse actually meant what he said. And the prosecutor must have had an inkling of that, because he began to waver in his conviction that all this bible talk was just pretence. He accepted Bosse’s bible and thought that immediate salvation might be his only option.
    ‘Can we once and for all get back to the business at hand?’ he asked. ‘What happened to that damned suitcase in Malmköping?’
    ‘No swearing!’ lectured The Beauty.
    ‘Perhaps it’s my turn again?’ Allan said. ‘Well, you see, I went to the bus station a little earlier than I had expected, because Julius asked me to. Bolt Bylund had previously phoned Per-Gunnar in Stockholm and had been – if you, Mr Prosecutor, will again excuse my language – a bit tipsy! And as you will know, Mr Prosecutor, or perhaps as you may not know because I don’t know your drinking habits, but anyhow… where was I? Yes, you know, Mr Prosecutor, how when vodka goes in, common sense goes out, or whatever the saying is. I, myself, in a state of inebriation, have said more than I should have in a submarine at a depth of two hundred metres in the middle of the Baltic Sea…’
    ‘In the name of God, get to the point!’ said Prosecutor Ranelid.
    ‘No blasphemy!’ urged The Beauty.
    Prosecutor Ranelid put one hand on his brow while he inhaled deeply a few times. Allan Karlsson went on:
    ‘Well, Bolt Bylund had phoned Per-Gunnar in Stockholm to say that he was resigning from Per-Gunnar’s Bible Club, and that instead he intended to join the Foreign Legion but that first of all – and at this point you ought to sit down, Mr Prosecutor, because what I am going to say is dreadful – he intended to make a bonfire of the bibles in the main square in Malmköping!’
    ‘To be more precise, he is said to have yelled “those damn fucking bibles”,’ said The Beauty.
    ‘No wonder, then, that I was sent out to find Mr Bolt and take the suitcase from him before it was too late. We often have little time, and sometimes we have even less time than we can possibly imagine. Like, for example, on the occasion when General Franco in Spain very nearly got blown to bits before my very eyes.’
    ‘What has General Franco in Spain got to do with this story?’ wondered Prosecutor Ranelid.
    ‘Nothing whatsoever, Mr Prosecutor, other than that I let him serve as an illustrative example. You can never have too much clarity.’
    ‘In that case, what if you, Mr Karlsson, were to bring some clarity to this matter? What happened to the suitcase?’
    ‘Well, Mr Bolt didn’t want to give it to me, and my physique didn’t really allow me to try to take it by force, not just my physique for that matter. In principle I think it’s terrible the way people—’
    ‘Stick to the subject, Mr Karlsson!’
    ‘Yes, my apologies, Mr Prosecutor. Well, when Mr Bolt, in the middle of everything, needed to visit the station’s public conveniences, then I took my chance. Together with the suitcase, I goton the Strängnäs bus which took me to Byringe and old Julius here, or Julle as we sometimes say.’
    ‘Julle?’ said the prosecutor, as he felt he had to say something.
    ‘Or Julius,’ said Julius. ‘Nice to meet you.’
    The prosecutor sat in silence for a few moments. Now he had actually started making some notes, and he seemed to be drawing connecting lines between the notes.
    ‘But, Mr Karlsson, you paid for the bus journey with a fifty-crown banknote and wondered how far it would get you. How does that fit in with having a deliberate intention of travelling to Byringe and nowhere else?’
    ‘Hah!’ said Allan. ‘I know perfectly well what it costs to travel to Byringe. I just happened to have a fifty-crown note in my wallet and I simply had a bit of fun with the driver. That’s not against the law, is it, Mr Prosecutor?’
    Prosecutor Ranelid didn’t bother to answer.
    ‘Briefly, what happened next?’
    ‘Briefly? Briefly, Julius and I, we had a nice evening together, until Mr Bolt came and tried to unbolt the door, if you will excuse the pun, Mr Prosecutor. But since we had a bottle of vodka on the table, and you will