The Annihilation of Foreverland

sees you, Reed. She sees you in everyone’s thoughts when they go inside the needle. She knows you’re staying in the Haystack and suffering and refusing to come for her. She’s alone and something is after her. You got to tell me why you’re not going inside to help her.”
    Reed bowed his head lower like he barely had the strength to hold Danny’s words.
    “She’s in your dreams,” Danny added, “but that’s a dream, man! Lucinda’s alive, I’m telling you.”
    Reed jerked. He turned away. No sound came out of him. Just quiet convulsions.
    “It’s a trick, Danny Boy. The Director’s got you fooled.”
    “It was no trick. She was—”
    “YOU THINK I LIKE THIS?”
    Reed shoved his hands in Danny’s face. They weren’t just swollen, they were misshapen and three different colors of purple, parts of them black. Thin red lines streaked down his wrists.
    “You don’t think I want to see her? That I just want to dream about her, that I don’t want to touch her, smell her? That I don’t want to be with her, Danny Boy, to know she’s okay? To know she’s alive? Is that what you think?”
    Danny pulled his head back.
    “It’s hopeless, Danny Boy.” Reed walked away. “It’s all hopeless.”

    Lucinda.
    Her name opened a memory.
    Reed suddenly remembered, with fine clarity, a time he was driving a truck – a twenty year old pickup – with torn seat covers. He reached for the stick shift between her knees.
    “We’re doing it, Reed!” Lucinda said. “We’re really doing it!”
    The landscape rolled past them with long legs of corn and bushy fields of soybeans, dotted with silos and lonesome houses. The wind blew her red hair around. Lucinda grabbed Reed’s face and planted a kiss. Her lips wet, warm and full.
    Bip. It ended. Memory, over and out.
    But it wasn’t a dream, it was a memory. He remembered her.
    He remembered that he loved her.
    She’s real .

    Danny stepped next to him. They were at the end of the hall, standing at one of the glass walls that overlooked the dormitory and the Yard. And, beyond that, the Haystack.
    “The world, it’s out there, Reed.” Danny told him about hacking the firewall, locating the island through the satellite system. “There’s hope.”
    “Can you do it again?” Reed asked, staring out.
    “I don’t know, it was some wild code. It was evolving like an organism, never seen anything like it.”
    “You can’t just send for help. They’ll have that figured out.”
    “I know.”
    “It has to be something the whole world will see, Danny Boy. You got to give them a reason to search for us.”
    Reed hung his hands inside his shirt like a hammock. He couldn’t fold his arms and it hurt too much to let them hang at his sides. Besides, hiding them kept Danny from staring. Reed just wanted to get to the beach where he could be in the sun alone with the memories. He wanted to drive down that country road, again. He wanted to kiss her.
    Lucinda. You’re in there and I’m out here. The Haystack is nothing compared to that.
    “Danny Boy?” Mr. Jones called from the doctor’s office. “Son, the doctor would like to see you now.”
    Danny waited a bit, turned and nodded at the old man. He started to say something to Reed then went on his way. Mr. Jones closed the door behind them. He’d get his lip fixed and be ready for the next round. Reed only hoped he could do it again. Yes, he hoped.
    Because he wouldn’t be able to resist much longer.

35
    The cafeteria was full. But the table Danny was sitting at was empty.
    He was in the corner, far away from the windows. The compartments on his lunch tray were filled with pudding, Jell-O and noodles. No chewing required. The doctor patched the gaping hole with a gel adhesive, but it didn’t relieve the swelling. Pressure on his teeth hurt. His smile was lop-sided, but there wasn’t much to smile about.
    He slurped a spoonful of pudding and looked at the lined sheet of paper in front of him. He chose the corner of the room because it was the farthest spot from the rest of his camp eating at their regular table. They were in last place in the game room. Without Danny, they’d have to suffer every round they went inside the Haystack until they all got smoked. That gave him a little satisfaction. A few guys asked him to come back.
    You’ve got to be kidding.
    Danny glanced up and Sid flipped him the middle finger.
    He also wanted privacy and the lighting was weak in the corner. He wrapped his arm around