The Dinosaur Feather

looked almost beseechingly at Anna. ‘Will you help me, please?’
    Anna placed her hands on her knees. ‘I’m not sure I understand. What do you want me to do?’ she said.
    ‘Keep your ears open. What are Svend and Elisabeth saying? What about the police? I know your chances will be limited, but just try to pay attention, please? And if you hear any rumours suggesting the parasites came from my stock’ – for a moment she looked anxious – ‘please contact me immediately. It’s important, Anna. I only have three years; afterthat the completion of our research projects will depend on outside funding, and I can promise you that if we are labelled as careless with potentially fatal material, we can forget about that. The Tuborg Foundation is currently our main sponsor and they only touch projects which are squeaky clean. I need to know if the axe is about to fall.’ She let go of the string of pearls which fell against her skin. ‘I need to be prepared.’
    Anna nodded slowly, and Hanne crumpled into the elegant sofa. She ran her hand through her hair and closed her eyes.
    ‘I’m absolutely exhausted,’ she sighed.
    Anna started wrapping her scarf around her neck and pulled up the hood of her jacket. Hanne kept her eyes closed and rested the back of her head against the wall.
    ‘I need to pick up my daughter,’ Anna said.
    Lily was kneeling on the ground, mesmerised by a polystyrene box full of seedlings, when Anna arrived to collect her. Her daughter held a watering can in her hand and listened dutifully as the nursery school teacher gave her instructions on how to water the seedlings. Anna sat down and watched her little girl from a distance. They had seen so little of each other and, for a moment, Lily seemed almost a stranger to her. She was her child.
Hers
.
    All of a sudden, the sun broke through the large windows of the nursery school, and Anna heard Lily say, ‘My granny grows sunflowers.’
    The nursery school teacher listened, replied and pushed back the soil around the seedlings where Lily’s watering had been excessive, despite the instructions. Just as Anna wasabout to call her, Lily turned around. She dropped everything and leapt like a kid goat to her mother.
    Anna noticed the earrings immediately. Two silver studs with glass beads. They caught the light. How long was it since she had last seen Lily? Two days? She decided not to say anything. Lily was pulling and pushing her, showing her around, jumping on the spot, climbing on to her lap, trying to slip her hands into Anna’s sleeves and up to her armpits. When one of the teachers came to give Anna some information and she hushed Lily to make herself heard, Lily had a tantrum. She threw herself on the floor, kicking, so one of her socks fell off. Anna tried to distract her by pointing to a drawing of a clown and getting Lily to tell her about it. Lily ignored her. Anna tried to bribe Lily with the offer of hot chocolate. It appeased Lily, but only for a moment, then the tantrum resumed. Anna was at her wits’ end and had no idea how to make Lily stop.
    So she ended up scolding her. She didn’t shout, but her voice was loud enough for one of the assistants to come over and help Lily put her coat on. Lily stopped crying and gave her mother a miserable look. Hand in hand, they walked down the path, out through the gate, across the communal garden and home to their apartment block. Anna promised herself she would never yell at Lily again. Back in the flat, they watched
Teletubbies
. Anna nodded off next to her daughter and when she woke up, Lily was gone. Anna found her in her bedroom where she was doing pretend cooking with beads.
    ‘I want to go to Granny’s,’ she said, when Anna came in and said hi. Anna squatted and tried to embrace her daughter.
    ‘No, darling,’ she said, anxiously. ‘You need to be with me. You need to be with Mummy.’
    ‘I love Granny.’ Lily looked away and carried on with her cooking. She seemed contented. She babbled as she poured beads from one container into another and spiced up her dish with some conkers and four small birthday cake candles. Anna went into the kitchen and tried very hard not to cry. She cooked dinner. Cheese and bacon omelette with a green salad. She cooked peas and carrots for Lily as well. They had a nice time at the table. At first, Lily refused to eat and looked away when Anna tried to feed her. Then Anna pretended the fork had come alive and every time Lily tried to bite