The Lesson of Her Death

students.
    Then—barely holding back tears—Randy Sayles began to speak, resonantly and impassioned, deliveringwhat might very well be his last lecture at Auden. Or, for that matter, his last lecture at any university.
    Corde was no longer pacing. He sat on the couch, slouched down and grim, and Diane was sitting in a straight-backed chair nearby. She held her hands in her lap. Jamie Corde sat between his mother and father. He looked shrunken. “Son, this is pretty serious. I don’t need to tell you that.”
    “I didn’t do anything.”
    “T.T. said you told him you were at the pond by yourself the night the Gebben girl was killed.”
    “I was. I was just fishing by myself is all.”
    Diane said, “Honey, please.”
    Her eyes were on a studded milk-glass candy dish and it was impossible to tell if she was speaking to father or son.
    “Jamie, we
want
to believe you. It’s just that T.T. talked to a couple of people say they saw
two
boys and you fit the description of one of them.”
    “So you don’t believe me. You think I’m lying.” This was a matter-of-fact announcement. He wouldn’t hold Corde’s eyes, which was okay with Corde because he would sure have trouble looking back into his boy’s.
    “Son, we need to know what happened. I don’t remember where you were that night, I—”
    Jamie leaned forward. “How would you know where I was
any
night?”
    Diane said sternly, “Don’t talk to your—”
    He continued, “Where was I
last
night? Two nights ago? How the hell would you have any idea?”
    His mother rebuked, “Young man.” But there was no edge to her words.
    The boy was quiet for a moment. Then he said, “I went fishing. I was there by myself.”
    A felony investigator, Corde had a dozen tricks he could try to drag the real story out of the boy. Bluffs andtraps and intimidations. He’d learned them from his journals and seminars and bulletins. He’d practiced them in his continuing education courses. He’d tried them out on car thieves and burglars. He couldn’t bring himself to use them now; he was crying out for the truth but he wanted it only one way.
    “Were you fishing by the dam?”
    “Not so close to the dam. Up a ways, in somebody’s yard.”
    “I’ve told you you’re not to trespass there.”
    Jamie didn’t answer.
    Corde asked, “Did you see the girl or anyone else that you hadn’t recognized before?”
    “No. I just fished then I came home.”
    “Why didn’t you tell me any of this before? You knew I was on the case.”
    “Because I was there alone and I didn’t see anything. What was there to say?”
    “Jamie, please.”
    The boy looked away. “I’m going to my room.”
    “Jamie.…” Corde scooted forward on the couch and touched his son’s knee. The boy remained unresponsive. Corde asked the question he’d been putting off. “The other night, Wednesday, you weren’t home either, were you?”
    Diane said, “Bill, what are you asking?”
    Jamie kept his eyes on his father. “He wants to know my
whereabouts
the night the second girl was killed. That’s what he’s asking.”
    Corde said, “Wait a minute, son. You can’t treat this so light. T.T. and Steve are going to want to talk to you.…” Jamie walked casually out of the living room. Corde’s face went bright red with fury and he stood. Then he sat slowly on the couch again.
    Diane said, “You know he didn’t have anything to do with it.”
    “I know he was there.” Corde looked at her miserably. “And I know he’s lying to me. That’s all I know.”
    Dear Sarah
…
    She read the note again but had trouble because of the voices from the other room. Something was going on with Jamie. Her brother scared her some. At times she idolized him. When, for instance, he would include her in what he was doing—like repeating jokes to make sure she got the punch line or taking her along when he went shopping at the mall. But other times he’d look at her like she wasn’t even in this world, as if he was looking
through
her. He would get all dark and secretish. In Jamie’s dresser Sarah had found magazines filled with pictures of women without any clothes on and a lot of copies of
Fantagore
—movie scenes of monsters, and people being stabbed or cut up.
    She guessed her father had found the magazines and that was why they were fighting.
    She tried to ignore them now and turned back to her immediate problem.
    Which was what should she give to the Sunshine Man?
    She wanted him to