The Lost Boy

former teachers, other interviews and my reports, the county recommends that David Pelzer become a permanent ward of the court.”
    I stared up at Ms Gold. I could barely make out her voice. I knew it was she who was talking, but her voice cracked. I glanced down at her skirt. Her knees were shaking. I clamped my eyes shut.
Oh my God,
I said to myself. As I opened my eyes, Ms Gold returned to her seat, covering her trembling hands.
    “Mrs Pelzer? Is there anything you wish to state?” the judge asked.
    Every head swung to the right, stopping at Mother. At first I thought Mother did not hear the judge. She simply stared up at his bench with a blank expression. After a few seconds, I realized what Mother was trying to do. She was trying to stare the judge down.
    “Uhh … Mrs Pelzer? Do you wish to make a statement in regard to your son, David?”
    “I have nothing to say, ” Mother said in a flat tone.
    The judge rubbed his forehead then shook his head. “Fine. Thank you, Mrs Pelzer. Duly noted.”
    The judge then turned to Ms Gold. “This is a very disturbing, very unusual case. I have read thoroughly all of the statements, and I have been troubled with the …”
    I lost track of time as the judge began to ramble. I felt myself shrinking inside. I knew in a matter of minutes the proceedings would be over and I would be back with Mother. I glanced over to the right to look at her. Mother’s face was stone cold. I closed my eyes, visualizing myself back at the bottom of the stairs and sitting on top of my hands, hungry -like a starving animal. I didn’t know whether I could go back to that life again. I only wanted to be free of the pain and the indignity.
    “David?” Ms Gold whispered as she poked me. “David, the judge wants you to stand up.”
    I shook my thoughts clear. I had fallen asleep, again. “What? I don’t under …”
    Ms Gold grabbed my elbow. “Come on, David. The judge is waiting.”
    I stared up at the judge, who nodded for me to stand. My throat felt as if an apple were stuck in it. As I pushed my chair behind me, Ms Gold tapped my left hand. “It’s all right. Just tell the judge the truth.”
    “Well, young man, ” the judge began. “What it boils down to is this: If the court so desires and if you believe that your home setting is undesirable … you may become a permanent ward of the court, or you may return and reside with your mother at your home residence.”
    My eyes grew wide. I couldn’t believe that this moment had finally come. In unison, every person in the small room turned toward me. A lady with grayish white hair held her fingers just above a strange-looking typewriter. Every time someone spoke, the lady tapped keys that looked like tongue depressors. I swallowed hard and clenched my hands. From the right I could feel Mother’s radar of hate turn on.
    I tried to look at the judge. I swallowed hard once more before I started to deliver my rehearsed line about how I had lied and that I had indeed caused all the problems at home and that Mother had never abused me. From the corner of my right eye I could see Mother’s eyes locked on to me.
    Time stood still. I closed my eyes and imagined myself being driven back to The House with The Mother, where she would beat me and I would be forced to live at the bottom of the stairs, dreading the second set of commercials, wishing I could someday escape and become a normal kid who was allowed to be free of fear, to play outside …
    Without Ms Gold knowing, I turned to her and inhaled again. Suddenly it hit me – Ms Gold’s perfume. It was the same perfume she wore whenever she gave me a hug or held me as we lay at the end of the couch. I saw myself playing with her hair.
    My mind switched to seeing myself outside, laughing with the other children, playing basketball, searching for each other in a game of tag and running at hypersonic speeds through Aunt Mary’s home; then at the end of the day being dragged in from outside after hunting for snakes or playing by the creek. I opened my eyes and peeked at my hands. They were no longer red. In fact, my skin had a light tan.
    I could feel Mother’s radar drill through me. I felt myself leaning to the right, a surge of fear creeping up my back. I took in another whiff of Ms Gold’s perfume.
    I held my breath for a fleeting second, then before my courage disappeared I blurted out, “You, sir! I want to live with you! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to tell! I