The Lost Boy

was so scared and why he had been crying.
    I nodded in return. Now I understood.
    After my argument with Larry Jr, I kept to myself and tried to stay as far away from him as I could. But whenever no one was around and I found myself running into him, for no reason I’d blurt out feelings of hatred at him. Sometimes he’d simply swear, while other times he’d chase me around the home. Larry would always catch me and tackle me to the floor. Once, after punching me a few times in the arm, he yelled, “Say ‘uncle’!”
    I didn’t understand. I twisted from side to side, trying to squirm myself out from under Larry as he sat on top of my chest and continued to hit me. “No way!” I yelled back.
    After a few minutes I could see the sweat pour from his forehead. “Say uncle! Say it!” Larry panted. “Give up, man!”
    Even though I was exhausted from struggling to get away, I felt that I was wearing Larry down. “No way! You ain’t my uncle. Now get off!”
    Larry let out a laugh as he rolled off me. Without thinking, I laughed, too. He patted me on the back. “You okay, kid?” I nodded. “I’ll say one thing for you, runt: you got a lot of nerve. You never give up, ” he said, still panting. “But you are the most craziest son of a …”
    Suddenly I sprang up and shoved Larry on the floor with all my might. I pointed my finger at him, and he seemed dazed by my actions. “I’m not crazy! And don’t you ever,
ever,
say that to me again!” I screamed, as I burst into tears.
    From below I could hear Mrs Catanze close the front door. I fixed my eyes on Larry as long as I dared, before hiding in my bedroom.
    “What’s going on now?” Lilian asked with a huff. “Are you two fighting again? I tell you, I’ve about had it with the both of you.”
    “Mrs C, it ain’t me, but the runt, ” Larry said in a low voice. “He ain’t right. I mean, he’s loony toons, man. I was just playing with him, and he went off on me.”
    I turned away from the door and cried.
    I didn’t know why I was so stupid. I had tried so hard to understand what the other foster kids were saying so I could learn – so I could be accepted within the group of the older kids. I wanted so badly to be liked. But I still couldn’t comprehend.
Maybe
I told myself,
I
am
a moron. Maybe I
am
crazy.
    I turned when I heard a faint tapping on the door. I quickly wiped my nose with the sleeve of my shirt before opening the door. “Can I come in?” Mrs Catanze said with a bright smile. I nodded my head yes.
    “So, you and Larry were at it again?” she asked.
    I nodded my head again, but more slowly.
    “Well, what do you think we ought to do?”
    I closed my eyes as tears rolled down my face. “I just don’t know why I feel so bad, ” I cried.
    Mrs Catanze wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “Not to worry. This is something we’ll just have to work through.”
    A few days later Rudy and Lilian drove me to a doctor’s office. Rudy stayed in the blue Chrysler as Lilian walked me to the office. She and I waited for several minutes until an elderly woman directed Lilian into another room. After a few minutes Lilian returned. She knelt down and told me I was going to see a special doctor who was going to make me feel better “up here, ” Lilian said, as she pointed to my head.
    Moments later, I followed the same lady who had escorted Lilian. She opened a wide door and waved her hand as if telling me to enter. As carefully as I could, I walked into the room. The lady closed the door behind me. I stood alone in a dark room. I searched for an open window, but I could tell that the shades were drawn. The room had an eerie feeling. I remained standing in the middle of the room for several seconds until a man, whom I hadn’t seen when I came in, told me to sit down. I jumped when I heard the stranger’s voice. The man flicked on the light on his desk. “Come on now, sit; sit down.” I obeyed, finding an oversized chair. I sat and stared at the man. I waited for him to say something, anything.
Am I in the right room, the right office? Is he the doctor? Surely he can’t be a psychiatrist!
    Seconds turned into minutes. Though I tried, I could barely make out the outline of the man’s face. He rubbed his two hands together as he appeared to study me. My eyes darted from side to side. I could see there was a long couch against the wall behind me. The other walls of the room were covered with shelves filled with books.
    As the man