The Men in her Life

poison. Or you can get the council tomorrow, and they’ll do the same for free.’
    ‘I don’t mind paying.’
    ‘It’s not that. It’s that once you get in a private firm the council won’t touch it. Which could be a problem if it recurs, you see...’
    ‘Recurs?’ It didn’t bear thinking about.
    ‘Either way they say it takes seven to ten days for the poison to work...’
    ‘Seven to ten days? What am I going to do? Are you sure?’ Holly asked him accusingly, implying that he hadn’t asked the right questions on the phone, ‘there must be some quicker way...’
    ‘Apparently not.’
    ‘What if I were the Queen? Surely she wouldn’t have to put up with rats for a week?’
    ‘There’s probably someone called the Royal Ratcatcher with a shotgun...’ Simon mused.
    ‘Well, how can we get hold of him?’
    ‘Holly,’ Simon crouched on the floor beside the sofa, ‘you’re going to have to be brave. You’ve got a problem, it won’t go away for a week or so, and in the meantime you’ve just got to pretend it’s not happening...’
    ‘Easy for you to say, you haven’t got a bloody infestation of vermin in your flat...’
    ‘Who knows? Believe me I want this sorted out as much as you do, it’s a bit too close for comfort...’
    ‘Oh God, you don’t think it can get in here?’ Holly hugged her knees, trying to make herself small in the corner of the sofa. In the kitchen, the kettle clicked off. She screamed.
    ‘Come on, I’ll take you back to your flat. We’ll look everywhere. I’m sure it will have gone. I bet your screaming frightened it. It frightened me...’
    ‘I’m not going,’ Holly told him, shrinking even further into the sofa.
    ‘Rats don’t attack unless they’re cornered,’ Simon said.
    ‘But what if I cornered one accidentally?’ Holly wanted to know, thinking of all the nooks and crannies of her flat where a rat might think itself safe only to have her loom inadvertently above it.
    ‘Come on...’ he held out his hand.
    ‘You can’t make me...’
    ‘Holly. Come on, even if I let you sleep here tonight, it won’t be over for at least a week...’
    ‘Simon, read my lips, I’m not going back into my flat...’
    ‘All right,’ he admitted defeat. ‘There’s no need to take it out on me...’
    ‘Can I stay here tonight?’ Holly asked him more humbly.
    ‘Well, all right. But you’ll have to sleep on the sofa because Tansy is coming round.’
    ‘Tansy?’
    ‘I know it’s a silly name, but she’s a very nice person... how’s Matt?’
    ‘Matt?’
    ‘Ella’s boyfriend. The one who looks like a pop star who’s been staying at your flat.’
    ‘He left last week,’ Holly said, but even in the semi-darkness she could feel herself going red. ‘Would you be a love and get me some clothes?’ she asked.

    ‘I heard that wherever you are in London , you’re always within thirty feet of a rat,’ Tansy said, after the introductions had been made and Holly’s presence explained.
    ‘I don’t see how that can be true,’ Holly said, logic battling with her desire to get off the subject. ‘I mean, say if you’re at the top of the Post Office tower?’
    ‘Well, how many people are?’ Tansy asked. ‘Maybe there’s rats in the walls,’ she speculated.
    Whenever Holly heard the word rat, she felt as if she’d seen one.
    ‘When they jump at you, they’re not going for your throat, really,’ Tansy continued, ‘they’re going for the light.’
    ‘That’s comforting,’ Holly said, shrinking backwards. If she became any smaller, she thought, she would pass for a cushion on the sofa.
    ‘I don’t think we’re really helping Holly by talking about it,’ Simon said gently.
    ‘They’re really very small,’ Tansy said, ‘it’s their fur that makes them look bigger. If you took away the fur you could tread on one easily.’
    ‘Oh just shut up!’ Holly screamed at her.
    ‘I was only trying to help.’
    ‘Perhaps we’d all better get some sleep,’ Simon intervened diplomatically.

    Holly lay on the beige sofa fully clothed. It was a hot night, but she didn’t want to take off the jeans Simon had brought over from her flat. With jeans and shoes on, she felt better able to cope. What was she going to do? Clearly she couldn’t stay here another night. It wasn’t fair to play gooseberry and anyway, she didn’t think she could stand any more of Tansy’s rat facts. There was no way Mo was going to welcome her home at this point, even if Holly