The Misadventures of the Laundry Hag 00 - Swept Under the Rug

weren’t so glorious. He looked back when he realized I hadn’t followed him.
    “It’s best to keep moving, that way the demons can’t catch you.”
    “That’s easy for you to say, you were never the fat girl in gym class who couldn’t outrun her own shadow,” I snipped at him. Gesturing at the roaring surf, I continued, “Besides, I’ve hit the Atlantic. Running is no longer an option.”
    He strolled back over to me, locks of hair tussled in the early morning sea breeze. If possible he appeared even more magnificent in motion. Something in the way he moved choreographed lethal intent, a dangerous predator, lying low, waiting for the right moment to spring at his unsuspecting prey.
    “Then you’ve got to swim for it,” he informed me, before he did just that. His easy gait morphed into a determined sprint and he crashed against the oncoming waves—one awesome force of nature against another.
    I think a crab crawled into my mouth when my jaw hit the sand. Stupefied, I watched him swim in the cold water, a steady crawl full of power growing smaller as he neared the horizon. And then he vanished.
    “Okay, Maggie, you’re officially psychotic,” I murmured to myself and sat down hard on the sand. My gaze trained on the spot where he had disappeared and I wondered what Freud would say about my vision. Probably something like I hated my mother and needed to get laid.
    Maybe he was a merman, returning to his home beneath the sea where he could shag Ariel and tell tales about the chemically unbalanced woman he’d met on the beach.
    “If she is an example of the people above, the land is ripe for the picking!” he would announce to his fellow mer-folk as they dined on lobster before a roaring fire in the great hall. Although how the fire stayed lit underwater, or how they cooked the lobster for that matter…
    “Hey!”
    I looked up for the second time to see my dripping wet merman—sans fins—holding out his hand to me. He held my one-point-five carat solitaire, which looked none the worse for wear. I took it from him with a shaking hand.
    “Oh my God.” Water dripped from his hair, eyelashes, nose and chin and I shivered in sympathy as the cool wind cut through my denim jacket. “Are you insane? You’re going to catch hypothermia!”
    He winked at me. “Not likely. The water temperature is in the low fifties. I’ve been in much colder water for longer periods of time. It’s not exactly comfortable, but I’ll pull through.”
    Master of the understatement.
    “Come on.” This time he strode back up the beach without checking to see if I tagged along. Only and idiot would, but follow I did. He stopped short of the boardwalk where he retrieved a fraying blue towel and a small white card, which I instantly recognized as a hotel room key.
    “You leave your hotel key sitting in the sand?” My tone sounded incredulous. “Where are you from, Mayberry?”
    He didn’t look at me as he dried his stylishly unkempt brown hair. “It’s a magnetized card. If I’d lost it, I’d go to the front desk and they’d issue me a new one.”
    “Yeah, but someone could steal it, go through your stuff.”
    He shrugged. “Whatever, it’s just stuff. Nothing irreplaceable.”
    I remained silent as he slipped on a pair of leather sandals and headed up the ramp to the boardwalk. He made no concession to the wind as it slapped his wet clothing, just strode along at a steady pace with me trailing behind him like a bitchy lost mongrel hoping for a good belly scratch.
    The princess cut diamond bit into my palm. I wanted to ask his name and how he had retrieved my ring, but even despite his assurance that he wouldn’t freeze to death, I wanted him to get warm and dry as soon as possible. Answers could wait.
    We were the focus of more than a few raised eyebrows as we entered the hotel lobby, not one of the pricier ones along Atlantic Avenue, but a nice little five story place with quite a bit of charm. My haggard appearance might have drawn notice if I’d been alone, but my companion commanded all the attention. I figured the men were astonished by his sodden clothing while the women were checking out his magnificent bod. He dripped into the elevator and I paused, unsure if I wanted to go all the way. Into his room. Where he would get naked.
    A low growl rumbled in his chest as he reached for my arm and propelled me into the elevator. I didn’t resist, glad to follow a little while longer and study every detail