The Narrows

of them."
    "I see."
    I looked over her head at Eleanor and smiled. I wasn't mad about anything. I was simply in love with my daughter and how she viewed her world. The literal way in which she took it all in and took it on. I knew it wouldn't last long and so I treasured every moment I saw and heard of it.
    "Can I keep this picture?"
    "How come?"
    "Because it is beautiful and I want to always have it. I have to go away for a while and I want to be able to look at it all the time. It will remind me of you."
    "Where are you going?"
    "I'm going back to the place they call the City of Angels."
    She smiled.
    "That's silly. You can't see angels."
    "I know. But look, Mommy has a new book to read to you about a monkey named Billy. So I'm going to say good night now and I'll get back to see you as soon as I can. Is that okay, baby?"
    "Okay, Daddy."
    I kissed her on both cheeks and hugged her tight. Then I kissed the top of her head and let her go. I stood up with my picture and handed her the book Eleanor would read to her.
    "Marisol?" Eleanor called. Marisol appeared within a few seconds, as if she had been waiting in the nearby living room for her cue. I smiled and nodded to her as she received her instructions.
    "Why don't you take Maddie in and get her set up and I'll be right in after saying good night to her father."
    I watched my daughter leave with her nanny.
    "I'm sorry about that," Eleanor said.
    "What, the picture? Don't worry about it. I love it. It's going on my refrigerator."
    "I just don't know where she picked it up. I didn't directly say to her that you fight demons. She must have overheard me on the phone or something."
    Somehow I would have liked it better knowing she had said it directly to our daughter. The idea that Eleanor was talking about me in such a way to someone else-someone she didn't mention at the moment- bothered me. I tried not to show it.
    "It's all right," I said. "Look at it this way, when she goes to school and kids say their dad is a lawyer or a fireman or a doctor or something, she's got the trump card. She'll tell them her daddy fights demons."
    Eleanor laughed but then cut it off when she thought of something.
    "I wonder what she'll say her mother does."
    I couldn't answer that, so I changed the subject.
    "I love how her view of the world is uncluttered by deeper meanings," I said as I looked at the picture again. "It is so innocent, you know?"
    "I know. I love that, too. But I can understand if you don't want her thinking you're out there literally wrestling with demons. Why didn't you explain it to her?" I shook my head and thought of a story.
    "When I was a kid and I was still with my mother, there was this time that she had a car. A two-tone Plymouth Belvedere with push-button automatic transmission. I think her lawyer gave it to her to use or something. For a couple years. Anyway, she suddenly decided she wanted to go cross-country on a vacation. So we packed the car and just took off, her and me.
    "Anyway, somewhere in the south-I don't remember where-we stopped for gas and there were two water fountains on the side of this service station. There were signs, you know. One said white and the other said colored. And I just sort of went up to the one marked colored because I wanted to see what color the water was. Before I got to it my mom yanked me back and sort of explained things to me.
    "I remember that and sort of wish she'd just let me see the water and didn't explain anything."
    Eleanor smiled at the story.
    "How old were you?"
    "I don't know. About eight."
    She stood up then and came over to me. She kissed me on the cheek and I let her. I put my arm loosely around her waist.
    "Good luck with your demons, Harry."
    "Yeah."
    "If you ever change your mind about things, I'm here. We're here."
    I nodded.
    "She's going to change your mind, Eleanor. You wait and see." She smiled but in a sad way and gently caressed my chin with her hand.
    "Will you make sure the door is locked when you leave?"
    "Always."
    I let go of her and watched her walk out of the kitchen. I then looked down at the drawing of the man fighting his demon. In the picture my daughter had put a smile on my face.

CHAPTER 36
    Before going up to my efficiency at the Double X, I stopped by the office and told Mr. Gupta, the night man, that I would be checking out. He told me that because I had been keeping the place on a weekly basis, my credit card had already been dinged for the entire week and I told him that was