The Never List

began.
    “Sylvia isn’t the only evil one here. I’m just as guilty as she is.” She paused, pulling herself together. I waited, my breath held, wondering what could possibly come next.
    “I was afraid to tell you when we were in the cellar. I was too ashamed. I didn’t think you’d understand it then, but now … now I have to get this out. Before it’s too late.
    “This”—she waved her arms to indicate the space, but we knew she meant something much larger—“this is my fault. Everything that happened here is because of me.”
    She was silent for a moment, then steeled herself to go on. It was clearly excruciating for her to say this.
    “When I was a student—his student—I wasn’t just his research assistant. I was … I was having an affair with Jack. I thought I was in love with him. And that he was in love with me.” We stared at her, stunned. I could not imagine voluntarily being close to Jack.
    She was holding back her tears now, determined to get the words out.
    “So he lured me here, and I was a fool. I was the beginning of it all,” she continued bitterly, “his fucking test case, and I suppose when I didn’t fight back hard enough, or outwit him, or break out, he felt secure enough to bring you down there.”
    Christine walked over to the spot Tracy and I knew so well. His place by the rack where he had always stood over us. She remained there perfectly still, her eyes staring at the floor as she tried not to break down.
    She looked up at Tracy, then over to me, and went on, “But it’sworse than that. I could never bring myself to tell anyone this before, not even the police. You see, there were two other girls before you got here. I”—she could barely say it—“I helped him abduct them.”
    “What—what do you mean?” asked Tracy, looking as if she’d been slapped. I couldn’t move. I just sat there, staring at her.
    “He brought me with him. I thought it was my only chance to escape, so I told him I’d behave. I didn’t actually intend to help him. Then there we were in his car, offering a ride to a girl about my age. I can still see her. Her hair was pulled up in a ponytail. She had a navy blue backpack and kept checking her watch. It looked like her bus was late. She seemed so innocent. I’ll never forget it: her eyes met mine, checking in with me. Checking to see if it was safe. I wanted to scream out that it wasn’t. Not safe at all. But I held my tongue because I was afraid.”
    No one moved. No one breathed.
    “And then we did it a second time. That second time I couldn’t meet the girl’s eyes at all until it was too late,” Christine had to pause to gather her strength again.
    “Neither of them lasted very long down there. They each went in the box right away, and after a few days each one went upstairs and never came back. I didn’t dare ask what happened.
    “And now, every night I see the faces of those girls in my dreams. Hell, every time I close my eyes. And I imagine I see them looking at me through my daughters’ eyes. That’s why I came out here right away when you called. When you told me there might be other girls, I thought … I thought we might find those two somehow.” She turned to me, accusingly. “But now we won’t. Because now we are going to die here .”
    Tracy stood beside her looking helpless, as Christine dropped to her knees and started to weep, slowly and softly at first, but then steadily harder and harder.
    I was preparing myself for the worst when she sat up abruptly, then bent down close to the floor. She was peering at something.
    “Wait a minute. What is … what is this?” she said, wiping her face and then pushing her fingers hard against a spot in the floor. That same spot. Jack’s spot. “What the fuck ?”
    Christine ran her fingers along the board and found some sort of lever. She pushed it, but nothing happened. We all crowded around her.
    Of course, I thought. Another of his sick games. Something placed there specifically for us to find. So we could know the answers, just before he had us killed.
    “Here, let me try it,” Tracy said. She pushed it harder, but the catch was stuck.
    “Hold on, hold on … there we go.” She eased it open.
    The floorboard came up, hinged on one side deep within the crevice of another board. There was a hole in the floor, about one foot by two. Tracy reached in and pulled out a small wooden crate, then lifted the lid. There was a smaller cardboard box inside on top of