The Six Rules of Maybe

close the words worst company in the world and Dean came to each other. The psychology books would have something to say about that. Zeus tried a different tactic. He lay down, set his chin on his paws. It was the cutest thing in the world, and I’m sure he knew it. We looked at each other, and he blinked one eye. Sometimes, I swear he winked on purpose. “It’s like he’s a person but not a person,” I said.
    “Dean?” Mom said. She kept ripping lettuce.
    “ Zeus .” I laughed. Maybe in her most secret, honest places she hated Dean as much as we did. You couldn’t help but see what he was really like, could you? I’d always thought telling the truth to other people was hard, but maybe that was a snap compared to telling the truth to yourself. Sometimes we just refused to know what we knew.
    “Where’s Juliet?” I asked.
    “Doctor’s appointment.”
    “For sure?” I asked.
    She stopped with the lettuce. Wiped her hands on a towel. “For sure.”
    “Did Hayden go with her?” Juliet couldn’t see Buddy Wilkes if Hayden were there.
    “Yes, Hayden was with her. Is there some reason you’re so concerned?” Mom opened the fridge, took out a cellophane bag of mushrooms. Then she looked at me, narrowed her eyes into a question. There were little wrinkles at their corners that I’d never seen before. Those wrinkles, and the few brand-new gray hairs at her temples—they made me want to be a better daughter from here on out.
    “I’m worried about—” I stopped before I said it. Buddy Wilkes . I had no real proof, not yet. I played the scene in my mind. Mom would defend Juliet; I knew that. That’s how it had been forever. Perhaps when things were too close, you just couldn’t see them. Same as when you held a piece of paper right up to your nose.
    “The baby ? You can say the word, Scarlet. It’s okay. We might as well get used to it. They’re seeing Dr. Crosby. Marla. Juliet didn’t want to go to old Doc Young, and I don’t blame her, even if he’s delivered every baby on this island for the last forty years.” Old Doc Young had hair coming out of his ears in surprised tufts and a little ancient car as old as he was with fluff coming out of the seats. Some people look like their dogs; old Doc Young looked like his car.
    “Juliet shouldn’t be eating so much sugar,” I said. “I saw her scarf half a box of chocolate doughnuts. It’s not good. It puts her at risk for gestational diabetes.”
    “You’re worried about Juliet . Oh I know, honey, me too. The idea of her going through labor … Our Juliet? Come here.” She opened her arms to me. She hugged me with the mushrooms over my shoulder, and I hugged her back and took the sympathy she was offering even if it was misdirected. “Juliet’s going to be fine. She and Hayden probably stopped at the park or something. It’s good for them to spend some time together.”
    The hug and those wrinkles made me feel especially open toward her and I chanced the truth again. “She doesn’t seem to love him enough,” I said into Mom’s shoulder. He could leave , I wanted to say; that’s what I most needed to tell her, what we most needed to talk to each other about, but right then Zeus started to bark madly. He took off, his toenails skittering and sliding across the floor. He knew the sound of Hayden’s truck—he could hear it blocks away. He stood by the front door, barking and wagging and waiting, his rump turning circles of joy.
    “They’re here now,” Mom said. She didn’t hear me. She let me go and went to the door.
    Juliet was already inside, and she tossed her purse on the couch. “God, that was too real.”
    Hayden came up behind her. He was grinning widely. He scruffed Zeus under the chin, then grabbed a handful of Juliet’s peasant blouse and pulled her backward to him. I felt a sharp pinch of want, which I quickly shoved into the recycle bin of my mind. “We heard a heartbeat.”
    Mom held her hands to her mouth. “Oh my God.” Her eyes were shiny as if she might cry.
    “Remember when I was in that play, The Bat ? Middle school?” Juliet said. Mom nodded. Mom had moved her hands from her mouth to her own heart. “They had this big piece of metal they used as a thunder machine. It sounded like that.”
    “ Shoo, shoo, shoo ,” Hayden demonstrated. His eyes were bright.
    “Beautiful,” Mom whispered. “Really. This is a beautiful thing.”
    Juliet pushed away from Hayden a little. “Kind of creepy, if you