Thief of Time

Susan. “All human-shaped…and it looks like they’re having a meeting.”

    Mr. White was losing patience. Up until now, he had never been aware that he had any, because, if anything, he had been all patience. But now he could feel it evaporating. It was a strange, hot sensation in his head. And how could a thought be hot ?
    The mass of incarnated Auditors watched him nervously.
    “I am Mr. White!” he said to the luckless new Auditor that had been brought before him, and shuddered with the astonishment of using that singular word and surviving. “You cannot be Mr. White also. It would be a matter of confusion.”
    “But we are running out of colors,” said Mr. Violet, intervening.
    “That cannot be the case,” said Mr. White. “There are an infinite number of colors.”
    “But there are not that many names,” said Miss Taupe.
    “That is not possible. A color must have a name.”
    “We can find only one hundred and three names for green before the color becomes noticeably either blue or yellow,” said Miss Crimson.
    “But the shades are endless!”
    “Nevertheless, the names are not.”
    “This is a problem that must be solved. Add it to the list, Miss Brown. We must name every possible shade.”
    One of the female Auditors looked startled. “I cannot remember all the things,” she said. “Nor do I understand why you are giving orders.”
    “Apart from the renegade, I have the greatest seniority as an incarnate.”
    “Only by a matter of seconds,” said Miss Brown.
    “That is immaterial. Seniority is seniority. This is a fact.”
    It was a fact. Auditors respected facts. And it was also a fact, Mr. White knew, that there were now more than seven hundred Auditors walking rather awkwardly around the city.
    Mr. White had put a stop to the relentless increase in incarnations as more and more of his fellows rushed into the trouble spot. It was too dangerous. The renegade had demonstrated, he pointed out, that the human shape forced the mind to think in a certain troublesome way. The utmost caution was necessary. This was a fact. Only those with a proven ability to survive the process should be allowed to incarnate and complete the work. This was a fact.
    Auditors respected facts. At least, until now. Miss Brown took a step back.
    “Nevertheless,” she said, “being here is dangerous. It is my view that we should discarnate.”
    Mr. White found his body replying by itself. It let out a breath of air.
    “And leave things unknown?” he said. “Things that are unknown are dangerous. We are learning much.”
    “What we are learning makes no sense,” said Miss Brown.
    “The more we learn, the more sense it will make. There is nothing we cannot understand,” said Mr. White.
    “I do not understand why it is that I now perceive a desire to bring my hand in sharp contact with your face,” said Miss Brown.
    “Exactly my point,” said Mr. White. “You do not understand it, and therefore it is dangerous. Perform the act, and we will know more.”
    She hit him.
    He raised his hand to his cheek.
    “Unbidden thoughts of avoidance of repetition are engendered,” he said. “Also heat. Remarkably, the body does indeed appear to do some thinking on its own behalf.”
    “For my part,” said Miss Brown, “the unbidden thoughts are of satisfaction coupled with apprehension.”
    “Already we learn more about humans,” said Mr. White.
    “To what end?” said Miss Brown, whose sensations of apprehension were increasing at the sight of the contorted expression of Mr. White’s face. “For our purposes, they are no longer a factor. Time has ended. They are fossils. The skin under one of your eyes is twitching.”
    “You are guilty of inappropriate thought,” said Mr. White. “They exist. Therefore we must study them in every detail. I wish to try a further experiment. My eye is functioning perfectly.”
    He took an ax from a market stall. Miss Brown took another step back.
    “Unbidden thoughts of apprehension increase markedly,” she said.
    “Yet this is a mere lump of metal on a piece of wood,” said Mr. White, hefting the ax. “We, who have seen the hearts of stars. We, who have watched worlds burn. We, who have seen space tormented. What is there about this ax that could cause concern to us ?”
    He swung. It was a clumsy blow, and the human neck is a lot tougher than people believe, but Miss Brown’s neck exploded into colored motes and she collapsed.
    Mr. White looked around at the