Traitor's Moon

“What do you mean?”
    â€œI’ve been talking with my riders and some of the Bôkthersans today. It seems no one knew we were gone until late the next morning, yet you told us just now that you knew where we were going all along. So you kept your mouth shut long enough to give us a head start, then let Seregil go when you found him.”
    She strode over to face Nyal, fists on her hips. He leaned back in his chair, staring up at her uncertainly.
    â€œOn top of everything else,” she growled, “I find out that you’ve stayed loyal for years to a woman who broke your heart, letting her reel you in by the balls anytime she likes, instead of telling her to take a long stroll off the nearest short quay. Extraordinary behavior, all around! I know what I’d do if you were under my command.”
    â€œWhat?” he demanded with another flash of anger.
    Straddling his knees, she pushed him back, grabbed him by the ears, and covered his mouth with her own.
    For a moment she thought she’d misjudged; he flinched back, lips tight. Then strong arms came up to crush her close. Releasing her hold on his ears, she smoothed her hands back through his dark hair, letting herself be held.
    When the kiss ended he leaned his head back and raised a skeptical eyebrow. “This is how you discipline your riders?”
    She grinned down at him. “Well, no. In fact, if any of them lied to me that way, I’d tie them to the nearest tree and give ’em twentylashes. The same goes for lovers, by the way. But I wouldn’t mind having someone with your varied talents on my side.”
    â€œAre you asking me to go back with you?”
    â€œI already asked you, that night at the Virésse banquet,” she reminded him. “You never gave me an answer.”
    â€œIt would mean leaving Aurënen and following you back to your war.”
    â€œYes.”
    He reached for her hands, clasping them in his. “When I came back and saw that you’d been ambushed—you know I’m a good tracker. The signs I read as I followed you told me I was going to find you dead somewhere up that road. I had a few minutes to get used to the idea before I saw where you’d outflanked them. You’re an astonishing woman, Beka Cavish, and a very lucky one. I think you may just survive this war of yours.”
    â€œI plan to.”
    â€œThinking that you were dead, I knew that I loved you,” he said, as if that explained something.
    â€œI usually take what compliments I can get, but I’m not so sure about that one.”
    He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, tightening his grip on her hands. “Ah, talía! How do I say this? If only you were like Alec—”
    â€œAman?”
    Those hazel eyes snapped open. “No, a ya’shel. We call you Skalans ‘Tírfaie.’ Do you know what the word means?”
    â€œOf course. ‘People with short …’ ” A stab of dread killed the words in her throat.
    â€œI love you, talía,” he said, reaching to cup her cheek. “You’re the only other woman I’ve truly loved in my life. The first time I saw you, that morning in Gedre, with your wonderful hair blazing in the sunlight—” He sighed. “But pairings between our two races are difficult. Could you bear it, growing old while I stay young?”
    â€œCan you, you mean?” Beka climbed off his lap and walked back toward the window, marveling at the black, aching chasm that lay where her heart had been a moment before. “I see your point. You wouldn’t want to be obligated to some wrinkled old hag.”
    â€œStop it!”
    Once again, he’d managed to sneak up on her unheard. She spun around, startled. He caught her by the shoulders, his face mere inches from hers, close enough to see the tears in his eyes.
    â€œI am willing to risk it,” he rasped. “I just don’t ever again want tosee hatred and distrust in your face when you look at me. These past few days have been hard enough, between that and thinking you were dead. I will lose you, but while we’re together, I need your trust. I need you to have faith that I love the woman I saw in your eyes that first moment we met, now and forever, no matter what your age. Aurënfaie and Tír have loved before; it can be done, but only with trust and patience.”
    Beka looked into those clear, green-flecked eyes and felt