Vegan with a Vengeance

wrote a very flattering review of my TV show. Thing was, I still
didn’t have a TV show. Shortly after that Bust magazine contacted me to do a little piece about the nonexistent show. I was ecstatic. I called my friend and former vegan chef Terry and said, “Hey, want to be in this article with me?” She agreed. I then got her to agree to be the guest host in the first episode, which would feature sushi. Now, Terry is a complete sushi slut and she can’t possibly say no to anything that shows off her sushi skills. (Little did she know that I was actually roping her into my cult and that she would never be able to escape.) Then my friend and upstairs neighbor, Denise, who worked in independent media and television production, said she was really excited about the idea of the show. She volunteered her collective production company to handle all the technical aspects.
    When we actually started producing the show it seemed to strike a chord with people—two girls cooking in a real kitchen, making stupid sex jokes, and having a punk rock band in the living room chopping vegetables. I got so many wonderful letters over the following year—mothers with children that were lactose intolerant, seasoned vegans and vegetarians who wanted to thank us, people who just loved food and liked the show, new vegetarians with cooking questions. Lots of people asked if we had a cookbook, so I began to look into self-publishing.
    Now comes the Cinderella part. Across the country, a big-shot Beverly Hills literary agent, dressed in white, smoking a Cuban cigar with pinky rings on his finger (that is my artistic embellishment; he’s actually a mild-mannered Minor Threat fan originally from Ohio) called me and asked if he could pitch my book.
    And now you’re holding it in your hands. I hope that if you’re a new cook, it will empower you to be fearless in the kitchen. I hope that if you are an experienced cook, you will enjoy my take on things. If only one potluck is a success then my job here is done. But there better be a heck of a lot more than one.
    I would love to hear from you. Check out The Post Punk Kitchen Web site at www.theppk.com .

    How to Use This Book

    FIZZLE IS MY CAT. He often sits on the counter while I prep things. I know it’s unsanitary, but really, there is no keeping him away, so I decided to put him to work in the book since he can’t work in real life. (Fizzle doesn’t actually know how to cook—he’s just a cat.) Throughout the book he offers little tidbits of information that aren’t necessarily integral to the recipe, but that you might want to know—like the fact that miso is thought to fight radiation sickness and that flax seeds contain omega-3 fatty acids.
    You’ll also see Punk Points throughout, little tips that help make cooking or prepping a dish easier, like my top-secret technique for prepping a butternut squash.
    Other than that there is nothing mysterious going on—just follow the recipes and use my suggested substitutions if you need to. I remember once reading a Betty Crocker cookbook that asked readers not to deviate from a recipe—well I say no such thing. Deviate all you want, recipes are mere guidelines and everyone has different tastes. If the final dish tastes good to you, then it’s a success.

    Tools and Kitchen Stuff
    I HAVE A love-hate relationship with cooking supply stores. On the one hand, I love looking at all the fancy cookware and appliances, but on the other hand, do I really need brightly enameled French saucepans? No. But of course I go ahead and buy one anyway. That’s the problem. To help you avoid the same pitfalls, I’ve provided a list below of those items I actually use.
    âœ— A good knife is so totally necessary. It’ll cost you about $100 new, but you only need one and it’ll last a lifetime. I recommend an 8-inch chef’s knife. Professional knife sharpeners are a dying breed, but if you can find one, have him/her sharpen your knife for you—those sharpeners they sell in stores are crap. Take care of your knife and it will take care of you!
    âœ— I know I said you only need one knife but a serrated knife is mighty handy, too—you can go cheap here, though. Not just for bread; you can cut tomatoes more easily with a serrated blade. Don’t use it on onions, though, unless you need a really good cry.
    âœ— A paring knife is also useful. Not so much for paring,