Watch Me Disappear

me to the edge of the dance floor and offers some instructions and encouragement. I have to admit, I am having fun. He puts an arm around my back and pulls me in. It isn’t exactly dirty dancing, especially compared to the people around us, but it’s too close for me. I pull away, embarrassed to look him in the eye, but he smiles and guides me away from the dance floor and out to the cafeteria.
    “You’ve done well, grasshopper,” he says, dropping into a table where he can see the TV, but he doesn’t really look at it. He scans the room, and I follow his gaze until it lands on Missy and Wes, sitting by the windows, both of them looking bored. “Let’s check on the lovebirds, shall we?”
    Missy’s face lights up at the sight of us, but Wes turns his head away and looks out the window. “Where have you been?” she asks. “I’m dying to go dance!”
    “What, you couldn’t get him to join you?” Paul asks, motioning toward Wes.
    Wes looks at me and rolls his eyes.
    “Mind if I steal your date for a while?” Paul asks.
    Missy springs up from her seat. There is no need for Wes to answer. I take her seat and join Wes in silent brooding.
    “Not feeling the vibe tonight?” I say after a few minutes, breaking the silence.
    “Dances are stupid. I’d rather just hang out somewhere.”
    “I don’t know. Seems like a rite of passage or something. Like you just have to go to the dances because that’s what kids are supposed to do.”
    “Missy acts different in front of everyone,” Wes says.
    “I’ve never noticed—”
    “She flirts with everyone.”
    “Maybe, but Paul said you’re quite the ladies’ man,” I say, trying to get Wes to lighten up a little. He’s acting like he’s been jilted, and all Missy had done was get up to dance, which is the point of the event. “Is it true?”
    “I’ve had a few girlfriends.”
    “Not just any girls,” I say.
    “Some guys always think they’ll get turned down, so they never ask girls out, but when I like a girl, I figure, what the hell? Either she says yes or she doesn’t.”
    “Missy thinks you’re some kind of innocent guy who doesn’t know up from down when it comes to dating. She thought you might never get around to kissing her.”
    Wes laughs. “Always best not to move too fast,” he says.
    So Paul was right. That is Wes’s strategy. “So you’re, like, pretty experienced?”
    “Yeah, sure,” he says. “You could say that.”
    “So you’ve, like, done it?” I ask, hating how awkward the idea of sex is making me.
    “Are you asking me if I’m a virgin?” 
    I nod.
    He just smiles smugly.
    “Does Missy know?” I ask.
    He shrugs and I’m starting to hate that gesture.
    “She thinks you’re a virgin. Just like her.”
    “So what? Are you going to go tell her?”
    “It’s not really my place,” I say.
    “But you’re her friend.”
    I consider this. As Missy’s friend, it is my duty to tell her what I know about her boyfriend. And yet if I do, she might break up with Wes. And then Paul will be there to comfort her in her time of distress, and he won’t need me anymore as the intermediary. Probably Missy won’t need me much as a friend, either, because she’ll be with Paul, an instant ticket to the friendship of all of his popular pals.
    “I already told her what Paul told me, and she didn’t believe me,” I say. “Besides, if you like her so much, don’t you think you should tell her?”
    “If she asks, I’ll tell her.”
    We both sit there in silence some more, and then I ask Wes—ever a useful source of gossip—about Alison.
    “She’s a football cheerleader,” he says. “She’s young for her grade. She must have finally hit puberty or something, because she went from looking like she was 10 to being a hottie over the summer.”
    “She still looks like she’s 10,” I say.
    “You’re jealous,” Wes says. “If it makes you feel better, she hasn’t been with Hunter since we walked in the door.”
    I look around. Hunter is sitting in front of the TV with a group of guys. Alison is nowhere in sight.
    “I’m sure she’s in there dancing with her cheerleading friends. They’re probably showing off their back flips in the gym right now,” Wes says. “But really, don’t waste your energy on Hunter. He shows up at dances with the hottest girls, but he never dates any of them. If you want to know the truth, I think the kid is gay.”
    “Yeah, right,” I say.
    “I’m not joking. It would