Whiskey Rebellion (Romantic Mystery/Comedy) Book 1 (Addison Holmes Mysteries)

never.”
    I crept along the side of the house and started looking in windows. The first window I came to was an office of some sort, and it was empty except for a couple of boxes and a cheap metal desk. I exhaled a shaky breath and crept on, thanking God with every step that it was pouring down rain so no one could see me make a fool of myself.
    The next room was the kitchen. There was an open bottle of wine on the counter and two empty glasses sitting next to it.
    “All right. Getting closer.”
    The third window I came to was kind of small and set high up off the ground. I could see the light shining through, but there was no way I could see in without standing on something. I looked around frantically for a box or a table. No such luck. There was, however, a big oak tree that was growing right in between the bungalow and the house next door. If I climbed out onto the branch I would be able to see in.
    Now, I was no dummy, so I decided the best thing to do before killing myself in a tree was to make sure I couldn’t see them from another window. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.
    The tree was my only option.
    I’d never actually climbed a tree, so working for Kate was teaching me all kinds of new things, except I’d always hated to get dirty and nothing much had changed in my advanced age. All I can say is thank God for yoga because otherwise I’d be in real trouble.
    I jumped up and grabbed hold of the lowest hanging branch and brought my legs up to wrap around it so I was hanging upside down like a possum. I was miraculously able to swing myself up into a sitting position and from there I hoisted myself up to the next branch.
    “Piece of cake. I should have been a gym teacher.” If only it weren’t for those horrible blue wind suits they had to wear.
    I pushed myself with my legs as far as I could go towards the end of the limb and balanced while I dug the camera out of my front pocket.
    Note to self: Next time get the camera out before you’re lying on your stomach.
    “Oh man. Holy cow.”
    I’d hit the jackpot. The high window definitely looked into the master bedroom. I couldn’t really tell if I was looking at Mrs. Wilder or not since I didn’t have a close up photo I.D. of the parts I was looking at, but I was pretty sure I was at the right place.
    It was like looking at a car wreck. All I could do was stare and hope there were no injuries. I’d never seen sex like this before in my life, not like I had a whole lot to judge by, but I was pretty sure that Mrs. Wilder was my new idol. And I had no idea how she was hanging from the ceiling, but it seemed to be getting the job done.
    “Damn. Pictures.”
    I brought the camera up and started snapping pictures like a woman obsessed, afraid to look away in case I missed something. I don’t know how long I was in the tree, but I know I got an education I never got in health class.
    They looked to be winding down, and I realized I was pretty turned on and my body was frozen in one position. I must have been there longer than I’d thought.
    I looked up again just to make sure my cover was still safe and was surprised to see they’d started again.
    “Wow, good for you guys.”
    I ha d to say I was a tiny bit jealous, considering my sexual exploits revolved around The Tonight Show, and no matter how much I wanted to continue, Greg’s recharging period was about twenty-four hours. Maybe I should have gone for the twenty-year-old. Of course, Greg had been having sex with Veronica too, so I could be judging his staying power unfairly.
    My thoughts automatically veered to Nick. I’d be willing to bet he didn’t need any recovery period. He was probably one giant hormone with a permanent erection.
    I slowly untangled my legs and held in a yelp as thousands of tiny pinpricks ran rampant over my skin. I juggled the camera in one hand and tried to keep my balance, but it was hard to balance something that was dead weight.
    I’m pretty sure the thunder drowned out my scream as I hit the ground. It didn’t look like that far of a fall when I was standing on the ground looking up, but the breath was knocked out of me and I was pretty sure the ass was ripped out of my sweatpants, either that or I had explosively wet my pants.
    Maybe I should have worn the underwear after all.
    I lay on the ground for a couple of minutes and closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them I’d be at home in bed and waking up from a nightmare.
    Nope. That would be too