Alien Diplomacy

and my Bon Jovi hoodie. I didn’t want to risk another piece from my Aerosmith collection, but I still felt the need for some rockin’ support.
    “Something I think you’ll be happy about.”
    “Why all the mystery?”
    Jeff grinned. “I like to keep you guessing.” He was, of course, inthe standard black suit, white shirt, and black tie combo. You’d separate an A-C from their formal dress and their beloved Armani only if the entire safety of the world depended on it. The Diplomatic Corps were supposed to wear other, regular-type clothes, in order to blend in, but so far, Jeff had managed to make the suit work for everything.
    There was a knock at our door. Jeff went to get it, I got Jamie. “Papa Sol’s here for a visit, Jamie-Kat!” She did the Happy Baby Dance, which consisted of her sort of bouncing in my arms and making little squealy baby sounds.
    I heard what sounded like dog snuffles and cat hisses. Sure enough, we got through the bedroom door and were attacked by a tide of canines. “Dad, why are all the animals here?” I managed to get this out without Duchess, our pit bull, getting her tongue into my mouth, but it took some work on my part.
    Dad graciously took Jamie out of my arms. Jeff was otherwise occupied. Dudley, our Great Dane, had his paws on Jeff’s shoulders and was giving him a friendly face wash while Dottie, the Dalmatian, had her paws on Jeff’s waist, the better for him to pet her while also being mauled by Dudley. Duke, our black Lab, was trying to shove Duchess out of the way so he could monopolize my attention.
    “Argh! Sol, a little help?”
    “Sure, Jeff. Dogs, sit.” My father’s command garnered the typical response—the dogs ignored him entirely.
    I channeled Mom. “Dogs—SIT!” All four dog butts hit the ground. “That’s better. Dad, again, not that it’s not great to get a dog bath, and it’s still better than being in the Potomac, but what’s going on?”
    “Jeff didn’t tell you?” Dad asked, far too innocently.
    “Um, no. Jeff hasn’t told me anything. Something about not wanting to ruin a surprise.”
    “Oh. Um. Well.” Dad looked guilty. “Your mother hasn’t said anything?”
    “No. When I’ve talked to her, Mom’s been busy with all the excitement—”
    Jeff cleared his throat in that “shut up, shut up” sort of way. “Yeah, Angela’s been tied up, Sol. So why don’t you tell Kitty the good news?”
    Wonderful, Mom was hiding the fact that she was doing active fieldwork from Dad again, and that probably meant no one had told him about everything that had happened the day before. Plus, he wasn’t freaking out and demanding to ensure that Jamie was in onepiece, so the likelihood was good that Dad was being protected for his own peace of mind. Wondered how long that would last with the current situation going on and gave it no more than an hour.
    “So, what’s the news that has you and all the pets here?” A horrible thought flashed through my mind. “Oh, my God, Dad, did they attack you or the house?”
    “Did who attack me? The pets? No, of course not. No, they’re here so you can take them.”
    “Excuse me?”
    Dad coughed. “Jeff said it wouldn’t be a problem.”
    “We’re pet sitting? Where are you guys going?” Where could Mom possibly be planning to go, with us at the terrorism alert level we were at?
    Dad chuckled. “We’re not taking a trip, kitten. We’re just coming here.”
    “Dad, yesterday was a long, stressful day, and I haven’t been up long enough nor ingested enough Coke to be able to catch the most obvious of innuendos. I’m clueless.”
    He sighed. “Kitten, the Office of the President has been asking your mother for this for a long time. Before you met Jeff she was able to legitimately stay in Arizona. But now that you’re here, the President can’t see any reason for her not to be as well.”
    “Mom’s here all the time.”
    “Yeah,” Jeff said. “And she’s having trouble explaining how she’s showing up in less than a minute when someone needs her, when it should take her hours.”
    My parents had a gate installed in their house. It made a lot of sense, but I could see how the regular use of it could cause Mom, and us, some awkward explanations. “Um, so?”
    “And, what with our little Jamie-Kat here,” Dad went on, as he kissed her head, “it just seems to make a lot of sense. We’re going to be in a no-pets building, and Jeff said you had plenty of space and staff to