Alien in the Family

Jeffrey took the kingship, you were the clear favorite to marry her.”
    “Christopher had longer odds because of his relationship to Jeffrey,” Nana Sadie added.
    “Thanks. Oh, I assume everyone did the spit swear and pinkie oath?”
    “Yes, Charles. Carla had to have a special memory implanted. Everyone else, no issues. Most of us had our suspicions aroused last year, when all those handsome men came and took us to special bunkers for our protection. It was nice to know what was really going on. The children were all given the same lectures the A-C children get, apparently, and they seem clear on why secrecy is important and why you don’t talk about your alien relatives or you go to the doctors for special tests.” Nona Maria was laughing.
    “So you were all busy while we were out saving the world?” I didn’t know whether to be relieved or upset. Settled for a combination of the two. “And, Mom, everyone in the family knows, other than Aunt Carla? Even Aunt Ruth knows?”
    “Your Aunt Ruth was relieved to find out that by A-C traditions you and Jeff had been engaged for six months. She was on board after that. Your Aunt Carla firmly believes you’re marrying the Martini and Rossi scion and one of the top fieldimageering teams is assigned to her. She’ll see what we want her to see, just like all the hired help, and that will be fine.”
    “I can see so many ways this could end up not being fine. I can’t even talk there are so many ways.”
    “Oh, Kitty, relax,” Nana Sadie said. “James, what’s your decision?”
    “We’ll keep them.” He nodded. “Okay, girls, out of those. Make sure you bag your dress and mark it with the tag so there’s no confusion about whose is whose.” He pulled out his phone. “Need the pickup and returns I told you about. Right, very thankful, just didn’t work with the bride’s personal style. Right. Good, pronto.”
    Reader closed his phone and looked at me. “I have the mother and grandmother dresses already picked out.”
    “What’s Jeff wearing?”
    He grinned at me. “What I picked out.”
    “Is it a white jacket?” I asked hopefully.
    Reader looked pained. “No, it’s not. He looked smarmy in the white jacket. He’s in something that looks great on him, and that’s all you need to know until the wedding.” He went into the bedroom, presumably to bag my wedding dress.
    “I wanted a white jacket,” I called after him.
    “Don’t care,” he shouted back.
    “Ten dollars says she loves it,” Nana Sadie said quickly.
    “Taken,” Nona Maria said just as quickly.
    It was like I was in the middle of the Old Ladies Bookie Club. And it was run by my grandmothers. I needed a drink, but that was out of the question.
    Made do. Grabbed a bottle of sparkling cider and chugged it.

CHAPTER 62

    SEVERAL A-CS SHOWED UP and took the vast array of dresses away. I discovered we had a shoe store and a lingerie department in Chuckie’s suite, too. They’d just been hidden by the clothes.
    Shoes and lingerie went a lot faster. Since I didn’t need a bra, Reader put me into a white lace garter belt with thighhigh white hose. We had the commando versus thong argument. I won; in my experience, being dressed up meant I was at risk for my clothing being destroyed and my dress flying up in the air. We compromised, and my thong was white lace. Shoes matched the dress; they were high, but comfortable.
    “I need something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.”
    “Dress is new and borrowed.”
    “James, that means I can’t get it dirty. It’s me, you know it’s going to get dirty.”
    He sighed. “Fine. Jeff already told me to spend whatever on the dress you liked. Blue is handled.” He pulled a light blue garter out of his pocket.
    “Nice. So, blue and new handled, right?”
    “Right.” He looked at my grandmothers. “Who has a necklace or bracelet Kitty can borrow that will go with her dress? Older the better.”
    Mom raised her hand. “I do. It’s what I wore at my wedding. Yes, it’s with me,” she added.
    “What is it?”
    “Diamond necklace, should work just fine with the dress, bracelet matches. It was your father’s wedding present to me.”
    “Dad was a grad student when you got married.”
    Nana Sadie shook her head. “Your Uncle Jacob is a jeweler. You think he didn’t give his brother a deal?”
    “Right, sorry. Sort of dizzy and overwhelmed.”
    “That’s the story of your life,” Chuckie said with a