Alien Proliferation

Coleman is right—Missus Martini’s been complaining about not being allowed to do anything since the baby showed up. Look, I can’t stay here too long. They’ll notice I’m gone soon enough.”
    “We’re almost ready to put Operation Expansion into effect, Mister Cooper,” a different C.I.A. operative said.
    “You’re sure they’re not inside?” Cooper sounded frustrated.
    “No, sir. We’ve checked all adults inside the cathedral. No sign of Missus Martini or Mister White.”
    “Maybe they’re still trying to find Gower’s body.” Cooper shrugged. “Okay, keep on torturing Martini here until the baby can’t take it and shows up, with or without her mother. Mister Al Dejahl has to start the ceremony.”
    They were ready to leave, and that meant we were out of time. I had no sane idea of what to do. Pulled my iPod out, took my purse off. Tuned to Tina Turner’s “Steel Claw” and put it on repeat.
    “Any ideas, Missus Martini?” White asked in my ear.
    “Only the crazy one.”

 
    CHAPTER 58
     
    I LET GO OF WHITE’S HAND and walked into the room. “Hey, I heard there was a cool BDSM party going on that I just couldn’t miss.”
    Well, that got the full room’s attention. All the C.I.A. guys had guns it seemed, and they all pulled them and pointed them at me.
    “How nice of you to arrive,” Cooper said to me. “Excellent timing.”
    “Well, we sluts hate to miss it when all the hot guys are tied up waiting for us. So, let’s see. Humans have the guns, A-Cs have the speed. Should be fun.” The music was, in my opinion, Tina’s most rocking song ever, and it started to work on me. I could barely keep still. “You know, at a time like this, I just have to ask one question of you vicious bastards—WWWD?” I heard Chuckie start to laugh.
    “What’s that stand for?” Barbara Coleman sneered. “How stupid am I?”
    “Nah. What would Wolverine do? Oh, by the way, Professor X? Probably need your mad skills, too. And the answer to WWWD, Babs? He’d kick ass.”
    I saw the humans start to fire their guns. I ran, at a hyperspeed I knew was faster than I’d gone yet because I ran around the bullets. Kung fu moves were flowing like never before, possibly because I was doing them at what seemed like a hundred miles an hour. Guns went flying and so did humans. White was in here, too, I could just see him. He was also kicking butt as though he did it every day. Maybe we were the new Avengers. Needed to get him a bowler hat and an umbrella.
    The A-Cs leaped into action. Coleman was after me. I ran up the side of a wall, did a midair flip, caught his neck between my legs and squeezed. As we landed, I twisted. His neck looked funny.
    “Hey, Babs!” I picked up her husband and tossed him onto Barbara. She screamed as she hit the floor.
    “Poofs assemble!” I couldn’t help it, my first superhero fight was beyond what I’d ever imagined. I saw the six Poofs go huge and toothy as they poured in. I heard screams from the humans.
    Decided it was time to get the rest of Girl Power going. Grabbed one of the Diplomatic Corps and slammed his head into the bars holding the women. Had to slam him a couple of times, but he finally opened the door. Sure, he was dead, but who had time to look for keys? Noted the Gower girls had some weird metal things on their heads. “Bombs?”
    “Control devices.” Naomi was trying to get it off. “We can’t do anything with these on.” Guessed Chuckie and I weren’t the only ones who read the comics.
    Three of the A-C female diplomats tried to gang up on me. This was fine. Did Dragon Guards the Well, which was a great form for multiple attackers. I found myself wishing my kung fu instructors were here to witness this. This was a black belt performance for sure. I did a leaping splits kick and hit two of them in the head. Maybe double black belt.
    Melanie and Emily were pissed, and they waded in and started beating the two women I’d just kicked. I punched the third so hard she flew across the room, slammed into the bars above Jeff’s head, and then hit the ground.
    Turned around and pulled the metal controllers off the Gower girls. Considered that I could use a weapon. Reached out, grabbed one of the iron bars, pulled. It flew into my hand.
    There were several people ganged up on one, which one I realized was White. Spun my iron staff and waded in. It was a lot like when we’d fought the Alpha Four invasion—but I was better now. I cartwheeled through