Cut and Run 4 - Divide and Conquer

losing
    focus as he stared out at the lights of the city. He couldn‟t tell Zane
    what Nick had actually said. When Ty got tired of waiting for Zane. It
    revealed too much about Ty and how well he knew his plodding
    partner, how long he would just hang around and wait. Zane should be
    allowed the delusion that he still had secrets, right?
    He looked up at Zane guardedly. His cheeks flushed, and a wave
    of inexplicable loneliness coursed through him. “He just said I knew
    where to find him.”
    When Zane flinched, Ty caught a glimpse of emotion flashing
    across his face. It could have been pain, but it could just as easily have
    been anger. Or jealousy. Or Ty‟s own drunken imagination. It didn‟t
    make Ty feel any better.
    “You‟ve been friends a long time,” Zane finally said, his voice
    noncommittal.
    Ty hung his head, his eyes closed as he puffed on the cheap cigar.
    He had agonized over whether to tell him, and Zane didn‟t really seem
    to care one way or the other. That, or he was hiding his emotions
    behind that same damn mask, and what was the point? Would he ever
    get to a point where he could just be with Ty and not hide anything?
    “Yes, we have,” he finally murmured sadly.
    Ty stayed where he was, sitting on the lower step with his head
    hanging, afraid to move or open his mouth again for fear of what he
    Divide & Conquer | 225

    might do or say. He had put so much of himself on the line these last
    few weeks, getting so little in return. Less than nothing, really, since
    he‟d lost an old friend and gained a myriad of new problems.
    When Zane shifted his weight and pulled the screen door open so
    he could walk back inside, leaving Ty alone on the stoop, Ty couldn‟t
    let him go. Dammit, he needed someone to let him be weak just once,
    someone to let him break down.
    “Zane?” Ty said shakily, his voice agonized and miserable. He
    breathed in deeply, trying to regain control of his emotions. One thing
    he did know for certain: he would get on his knees and beg Zane not to
    leave him alone tonight. He let out a gust of air, and when he spoke, his
    voice was calm. “I know I smell like cheap beer and cigar smoke,” he
    told Zane as he stared out into the night. “But I just….”
    He lowered his head and closed his eyes in embarrassment,
    unable to finish the request.
    For a moment there was silence, and then the creak and snap of
    the screen door shutting. Zane‟s shoes scraped on the concrete of the
    stoop. He stood there, waiting. “You just what?” he asked, his voice
    rough in the still night air.
    Ty turned his head, breath catching. His buzz was long gone, and
    his body was left trembling with nerves and emotions that he usually
    ignored or avoided. He could feel his breathing, uneven and difficult,
    and he knew his heart was absolutely pounding. He thought maybe
    Zane would be able to feel his racing pulse if he got any closer.
    So many times he‟d held his tongue, embarrassed to open up to
    Zane. So many times he‟d chosen to be the hardass, the one who
    supposedly didn‟t feel anything, the rock for Zane‟s more volatile
    mood swings. It had worked for them. It had worked for him. Now it
    seemed like the house of cards was crashing down around him, and he
    was just as tired of hiding himself as he was of Zane doing it.
    He closed his eyes and took one deep, calming breath, then stood
    and turned to look at his partner. “I really need a friend tonight,
    Garrett,” he said roughly, determined to keep himself from breaking
    down, at least for tonight. At least until Zane‟s sight was back and they
    could put this chapter behind them. “You think you can handle that for
    me?”
    226 | Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux

    After a moment‟s pause in the silence, Zane took a step to the
    side, pulled the screen door open, and held out his hand.

    THEY lay curled on their sides, Zane behind Ty with his arm over Ty‟s
    waist as he waited for his breathing to slow and his pulse to calm. Ty
    had shocked him tonight. Scared him.
    Coming out to his Recon team—and then admitting he was in
    love—Zane couldn‟t even imagine what kind of pressure Ty had felt.
    And on top of that, admitting who he loved? Zane was sure that hadn‟t
    gone quite as well as Ty had glossed over. They were his best friends,
    but he‟d kept a pretty major secret from them for a long time, and the
    man he said he loved was a stranger to them. Not the best of situations.
    And Nick. Nick, who‟d invited