Days of Love and Blood

and waited for seconds, shaking - gripping the scythe hard. The steps were close enough and I surprised him, swinging out from the corner, stabbing him through the neck. As I pulled out the blade I saw the rest from the corner of my eye, only steps away and grouped together. Five were left. I circled the shed, and ran back to the front, flinging open the door while they were on the other side in close pursuit. Once inside, I barred the door by sliding two misplaced stainless steel cabinets in front of it, only to buy time. I was about to open the window in the back when I noticed the canisters of kerosene and some wax candles melted onto a wooden bench.
    The flimsy wooden door buckled behind the weight of the group. The homicidals were thrashing to get inside and the cabinets were sliding away at each push. After emptying the canisters and saturating the ground with liquid, I opened the window and looked around before swinging my legs out. No one was on that side of the shed. I looked back to the door from the outside and watched it bow further and further until at last the shoddy barricade yielded and the homicidals rushed in.
    For a moment, I hesitated. I wondered if I was doing the right thing and darkness versus light wrestled behind my heart. All questions, doubts and thoughts splashed through my brain simultaneously: Were they human? Did they feel? Am I allowed to murder? They killed Ritchie. The last image absorbed the rest and I dropped the burning candle from my hand onto the earthen floor of the shed.

    I had been awake for a half-hour but remained dead-still in the crook of Cooper’s arms with my eyes purposefully sealed. He was already awake, gliding his fingers up and down my arm but otherwise remaining motionless. I awoke without a start. I felt Cooper’s body against mine before the memories from the previous night reminded me of why he was there. When they came flooding back, I didn’t sit up gasping or erupt into tears. I simply took the memories and pushed them back out, instead focusing my thoughts on Cooper. I allowed myself to feel his strength, to rely on it, to let him hold me.
    When I finally opened my sore eyes, light blinded them shut. I squinted against the brightness and pain shot across my temples and down the bridge of my nose. I put my hand to my face and sat up slightly on my arm.
    “Hey,” said Cooper. “Are you alright?” He put his hand on my shoulder and pressed his cheek to the side of my head in a protective manner, the way someone might soothe a child.
    “Yeah, I’m fine,” I replied. “Thirsty.”
    While Cooper went downstairs to fetch some cold water, I went into the bathroom to inspect the damage. A stranger peered back at me from behind the mirror.
    The skin above my right eye swelled out and sagged down, pushing my eye down with it. Purple and red tones colored the flesh above and below my eyes and two black lines crossed over my right eyebrow, remnants of Gretchen’s fine seamstress work. My top lip was blood-raw with a jagged cut and the bottom swelled out of proportion.
    For a second I let the reflection of my face bring back the sordid memories and I lurched forward, catching a sob in my hand. I surprised myself when I immediately overcame my weakness. Anger quickly replaced my shame and built piece-by-piece, growing rapidly. I gripped the edges of the vanity and the madness poured through my veins, down my shaking arms. Instead of thinking about what happened to me the night before, I focused on Willie and Anand. I thought about their lusts, their lack of humanity and compassion, the joy they received by watching another human suffer, the pain they liked to inflict. I allowed anger and hatred to fill me.
    I knew what Cooper wanted to do, but I couldn’t let him. As angry as I was and as much as I wanted it - I couldn’t let him kill those men. There were still some rules I wanted to live by, even if he didn’t agree. He would have to compromise.
    This was my responsibility.
    I heard Cooper running back up the stairs and decided not to tell him anything until after my discussion with the rapists. Arguing with him would only make him more determined, just like me, and the last thing I wanted to do was argue with Cooper right before I confronted the two beasts.
    “How do ya feel?” he asked. “Do ya - are ya in pain?”
    “ I’m pretty numb,” I answered as he handed me the water. “I’m going to go over there.”
    “I’ll go with you.”
    “Do