Deep Betrayal

piece of paper, folded in half, at the edge of the mattress.
    WAY TO RUIN A PARTY LILY. HOPE YOU’RE FEELING BETTER.
    I dropped the note on the floor and threw back the covers. My hair hung wild and tangled in my face, and I blew a few tousled waves out of my eyes. Jules cracked open my door.
    “How you doing?” she asked. The way she said it made me feel ridiculous. Maybe she knew how I got the goose egg.
    “Not sure,” I said, my voice froggy.
    “You freaked everyone out last night.”
    “I did?”
    “When you didn’t come back downstairs, Robby got worried.”
    I must have frowned, because Jules reproached me with a look that said I could be a little more appreciative of the fact he’d been paying attention. She was right, of course. He was only looking out for me.
    “So we came up to check on you,” she said. “You had the window open and you were lying on the floor in about a quarter inch of water.”
    “I don’t remember opening the window,” I said, more to myself than to Jules.
    “Your dad was all freaked out. Thought maybe you’d been hit by lightning.”
    “Was I?” My body did feel a little tingly.
    “Judging by the fact that you’re talking to me, I’m going to go with no. But you did get pretty soaked.”
    I glanced at the floor. It was dry. My mind flooded with light, over and over like the flash on a camera. A silhouetted figure filled the lens.
    “Robby and I soaked it up with bath towels. Don’t worry. My mom never saw it. You really don’t remember anything?”
    “Is my mom okay? She’s not worried, is she?”
    “No, not once we got you in bed. I mean … you are okay, aren’t you? Because Zach got his mom’s van; he’s picking us up in about twenty minutes.”
    My expression must have reflected my general bleariness.
    “Beach?” Jules asked. “Remember? You and me … breaking some hearts this summer?”
    The paper chain hung from my bedpost, as if wondering whether I’d add a thirty-second link. After last night’s hallucination, it looked even more pathetic than it had in days past. I could see it for what it was now: an anchor, holding me back. Jules was right. I’d let my fantasies get out of control. Leaning out into an electrical storm was just plain stupid. If Calder White wanted to be with me, there was nothing stopping him. Enough was enough. It was time for me to move on.
    We didn’t get up to Square Lake until eleven, and by that time the beach was already crowded. Jules and Colleen lugged the cooler down the hill from the parking lot, while Sophie pulled an inflatable raft behind her. The boys carried armfuls of towels and dumped them in a heap on the sand before taking off running into the lake. Colleen managed to claim the last picnic table, but it had a broken bench and it was covered in sticky pine sap. Out in the water, the boys were already tossing their football back and forth.
    I hadn’t been in the water since that disastrous day inMay. Now that I knew my father was a merman, I didn’t know what my half nature would mean.
    The lake sparkled with sunlight. It was beautiful, but I hung back and adjusted the straps on my vintage bathing suit.
    So what? I thought. So what that I’d never transformed into a mermaid in all the times I’d swum in Lake Superior. Maybe it was like bee stings, building up in your system over time until one day you’re stung and your throat swells shut. Maybe, with me, it would just take one more trip into the water before genetics would catch up with me. Would I really want it to happen here? Now? In front of my friends and a beach full of strangers? That would be my luck. Why did I agree to come again?
    Of course, Calder would say I was being ridiculous on all accounts. But then, he wasn’t here to tell me that, now, was he? Moving on , I reminded myself.
    “Coming in, Lily?” Rob called.
    I cupped my hand to my mouth and yelled back, “In a sec.”
    I’d been stupid last night, thinking I’d seen Calder below my window. If it had really been him, he would have waved. He might have even rung the doorbell. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a brown oval spiraling toward my face.
    “Heads up!” someone called.
    I managed to catch the football between my elbow and my ear. “Thanks, guys. That’s awesome. Hysterical.”
    Rob was there a second later, laughing and apologizing and dragging me into the water. I protested, pushing at his chest and trying to sit down so he couldn’t budge me. I grabbed