Faded (Rock Star Trilogy)

out, and somehow we would all be a family again.
    “Oh,” I finally say. I really don’t know what I’m supposed to say, think, or feel. But I know what I am feeling — hurt, angry, and partly relieved. I also feel guilty for feeling relieved. I shouldn’t feel that way about my parents getting divorced. Now, more than anything, I want to talk to Stacy. So I excuse myself, go to the bathroom, and I call her.
    “Hey, Scar,” she answers.
    “Hey. I was wondering if you’re busy today after school. I’d really like to come see you and Anna if it’s alright with you.”
    “Yeah, that would be great.” We are both silent for a second, but then Stacy continues. “I saw on the news… about mom and dad…”
    I feel a tear slip down my face. “I knew it was coming, but it still hurts.”
    “I know. Me too,” she agrees. “Bridgett told me about your documentary and your new album. That’s so exciting.”
    “Oh yeah, about that… Do you mind if I bring cameras? It’s really hard to shake these guys, and they are going to want you and Anna involved in this, since you are my sister and she’s my niece.” I hate asking.
    She sighs. “I knew you were going to ask me that. And I know that being in your life means doing stuff like this. Can you just let me think about it today, and after school I will call you? I want to see you more than anything, but I have to think about Anna.”
    “I understand. I should probably go now. I hope I get to see you tonight.”
    “Me too. I love you,” she tells me.
    I can’t help but smile. “I love you too.”
    I hit the end button and take a deep breath. The heavy feeling on my chest already feels lighter. Talking to Stacy was exactly what I needed. Now I just hope I get to see her tonight.
    I walk out of the bathroom and back to the table. Everybody is still staring at me. Maybe they’re waiting for me to break. Or cry. But I don’t. Instead, I turn to Ethan and Stephan.
    “We should probably get to school if we don’t want to be late.”
     
    11:06 AM
    Just a little.
     
    Since talking to Stacy earlier, I’ve been in a surprisingly good mood. She was exactly the person I needed to talk to about our parents’ divorce. Now I just hope that she lets me come over later to see her and Anna.
    The cameras are bugging me less now, though maybe I am just getting used to them. Earlier this morning, my director, Peter, got in trouble for talking too loud in my history class. He’s usually the one yelling at me, so it was kind of awesome watching the teacher scold him.
    Missing school has really put me behind. I don’t understand a lot of what’s going on in class. I’m going to need Ethan to catch me up, especially math. The only problem with that is I don’t have any extra time to study. It feels like I have to choose between my career and an education, and I hate that. I want both.
    In class, I go up to all my teachers just to make sure I don’t have any homework — they confirm that I don’t. I should be relieved, because I don’t know how I would find time to do the work anyway, but I’m not. I came back to school to learn, and I am not learning anything . I came to Hope for a normal life , but that obviously isn’t going to happen.
    But I can’t complain. This is everything I wanted (aside from the documentary). I wanted to have Stacy back in my life;I wanted family and friends… I wanted people to treat me like a person, rather than a rock star. I wanted my dad to stop controlling my life. I wanted to play my music , my way . And that is exactly what is happening… It just isn’t happening in the way that I expected it to.
    As I sit in study hall, Stephan is playing with my hair. It’s kind of distracting. I’ve read the same page at least three times, and I still have no idea what it says. I really don’t mind though. Stephan is a good distraction.
    Stephan is the one who makes me feel normal. Bridgett and Alec are both all about my career right now, and while I know they mean well sometimes I just need to clear my head. I love that Stephan is constant, and no matter what I need, he’s there. I hope that I can one day return the favor.
    I turn around in my desk and face him. “You’re kind of awesome,” I whisper.
    He grins mischievously. “Just kind of?”
    I hold my index finger and thumb an inch apart. “Just a little.”
    “Well, I think you’re a lot awesome.”
    I can’t help but smile.
    “You have a great smile,” he