Ice Cold: A Rizzoli & Isles Novel

and she stood as regal as a queen wearing her own crown of roses.
    “Mommy,” Katie whispered. “Mommy.”
    But the congregation had launched into a new hymn, and no one heard her through the singing.
    At the altar, her father at last released her arm. “Be good,” he muttered, and he stepped away to join her mother. She turned to follow him, but her escape was cut off.
    Prophet Jeremiah Goode stood in her way. He took her hand.
    How hot his fingers felt against her chilled skin. And how large his hand looked, wrapped around hers, as though she were trapped in the grip of a giant.
    The congregation began to sing the wedding song.
Joyful union, blessed in heaven, bound forever in His eyes!
    Prophet Goode tugged her close beside him, and she gave a whimper of pain as his fingers pressed like claws into her skin.
You are mine now, bound to me by the will of God
, that squeeze told her.
You will obey
.
    She turned to look at her father and mother. Silently she implored them to take her from this place, to bring her home where she belonged. They were both beaming as they sang. Scanning the hall, she searched for someone who would pluck her out of this nightmare, but all she saw was a vast sea of approving smiles and nodding heads. A room where sunlight glistened on flower petals, where two hundred voices swelled with song.
    A room where no one heard, where no one wanted to hear, a thirteen-year-old girl’s silent shrieks.

SIXTEEN YEARS LATER
    T HEY HAD COME TO THE END OF THE AFFAIR, BUT NEITHER OF THEM would admit it. Instead they talked about the rain-flooded roads and how bad the traffic was this morning, and the likelihood that her flight out of Logan Airport would be delayed. They did not speak of what weighed on both their minds, although Maura Isles could hear it in Daniel Brophy’s voice, and in her own as well, so flat, so subdued. Both of them were struggling to pretend that nothing between them had changed. No, they were simply exhausted from staying up half the night, trapped in the same painful conversation that was their predictable coda to making love. The conversation that always left her feeling needy and demanding.
    If only you could stay here with me every night. If only we could wake up together every morning
.
    You have me right here and now, Maura
.
    But not all of you. Not until you make a choice
.
    She looked out the window at cars splashing through the downpour. Daniel can’t bring himself to choose, she thought. And even if he did choose me, even if he did leave the priesthood, leave his precious church, guilt would always be in the room with us, glaring at us like his invisible mistress. She watched windshield wipers beat away the sheeting water, and the somber light outside matched her mood.
    “You’ll be cutting it close,” he said. “Did you check in online?”
    “Yesterday. I have my boarding pass.”
    “Okay. That’ll save you a few minutes.”
    “But I need to check in my suitcase. I couldn’t fit my winter clothes in the carry-on.”
    “You’d think they’d choose someplace warm and sunny for a medical conference. Why Wyoming in November?”
    “Jackson Hole’s supposed to be beautiful.”
    “So is Bermuda.”
    She ventured a look at him. The gloom of the car hid the careworn lines of his face, but she could see the thickening silver in his hair. In just one year, how much older we’ve grown, she thought. Love has aged us both.
    “When I get back, let’s go someplace warm together,” she said. “Just for a weekend.” She gave a reckless laugh. “Hell, let’s forget the world and go away for a whole month.”
    He was silent.
    “Or is that too much to ask?” she said softly.
    He gave a weary sigh. “As much as we might like to forget the world, it’s always here. And we’d have to return to it.”
    “We don’t
have
to do anything.”
    The look he gave her was infinitely sad. “You don’t really believe that, Maura.” He turned his gaze back to the road. “Neither do I.”
    No, she thought. We both believe in being so goddamn responsible. I go to work every day, pay my taxes right on schedule, and do what the world expects of me. I can babble all I want about runningaway with him and doing something wild and crazy, but I know I never will. And neither will Daniel.
    He pulled up outside her departure terminal. For a moment they sat without looking at each other. Instead she focused on her fellow travelers waiting at curbside check-in, everyone bundled