Mind Over Matter

of letters.” She took her glasses off to rub at a tiny ache in her temple. “People asking for her to help them. Some of them involved no more than asking her to locate a ring, and others were full of problems so heartbreaking they gave you nightmares.”
    “She couldn’t help everyone.”
    “That’s what I kept telling her. When she moved down to Newport Beach, things eased up. Until she got the call from San Francisco.”
    “The Ridehour murders.”
    “Yes.” The ache grew. “There was never a question of her listening to me on that one. I don’t believe she heard one argument I made. She just packed. When I saw there was no stopping her from going, I went with her.” She kept her breathing even with great effort. Her hands were steady only because she locked them so tightly together. “It was one of the most painful experiences of her life. She saw.” A.J. closed her eyes and spoke to him what she’d never spoken to anyone. “I saw.”
    When he covered her hand with his, he found it cold. He didn’t have to see her eyes to know the baffled fear would be there. Comfort, understanding. How did he show them? “Why didn’t you tell me before?”
    She opened her eyes. The control was there, but teetering. “It isn’t something I like to remember. I’ve never before or since had anything come so clear, so hideously clear.”
    “We’ll cut it.”
    She gave him a blank, puzzled look. “What?”
    “We’ll cut the segment.”
    “Why?”
    Slowly he drew her hands apart and into his. He wanted to explain, to tell her so that she’d understand. He wished he had the words. “Because it upsets you. That’s enough.”
    She looked down at their hands. His looked so strong, so dependable, over hers. No one except her mother had ever offered to do anything for her without an angle. Yet it seemed he was. “I don’t know what to say to you.”
    “Don’t say anything.”
    “No.” She gave herself a moment. For reasons she couldn’t understand, she was relaxed again. Tension was there, hovering, but the knots in her stomach had eased. “Clarissa agreed to this segment, so she must feel as though it should be done.”
    “We’re not talking about Clarissa now, but you. Aurora, I said once I never wanted to be responsible for your going through something like this. I mean it.”
    “I think you do.” It made all the difference. “The fact that you’d cut the segment because of me makes me feel very special.”
    “Maybe I should have told you that you are before now.”
    Longings rose up. She let herself feel them for only a moment. “You don’t have to tell me anything. I realize that if you cut this part because of me I’d hate myself. It was a long time ago, David. Maybe it’s time I learned to deal with reality a little better.”
    “Maybe you deal with it too well.”
    “Maybe.” She smiled again. “In any case I think you should do the segment. Just do a good job of it.”
    “I intend to. Do you want to sit in on it?”
    “No.” She glanced down at the stacks of papers. “Alex will be there for her.”
    He heard it in her voice, not doubt but resignation. “He’s crazy about her.”
    “I know.” In a lightning change of mood, she picked up her pencil again. “I’m going to give them one hell of a wedding.”
    He grinned at her. Resiliency was only one of the things that attracted him to her. “We’d better get started.”
    They worked side by side for nearly two hours. It took half that time for the tension to begin to fade. They read off lists and compiled new ones. They analyzed and calculated how many cases of champagne would be adequate and argued over whether to serve salmon mousse or iced shrimp.
    She hadn’t expected him to become personally involved with planning her mother’s wedding. Before they’d finished, she’d come to accept it to the point where she delegated him to help seat guests at the ceremony.
    “Working with you’s an experience, A.J.”
    “Hmm?” She counted the out-of-town guests one last time.
    “If I needed an agent, you’d head the list.”
    She glanced up, but was too cautious to smile. “Is that a compliment?”
    “Not exactly.”
    Now she smiled. When she took off her glasses, her face was abruptly vulnerable. “I didn’t think so. Well, once I give these figures to the caterer, that should be it. Everyone who attends will have me to thank that they aren’t eating Clarissa’s Swedish meatballs. And you.” She set the lists