On an Edge of Glass

potent charm wrapped up in a leather jacket.  Even with my brain buzzing, I don’t miss the way he looks up and down my body appreciatively. 
    “You,” I say dryly, shaking my arm out of his grasp.
                  He cocks his head and chuckles.  “It’s nice to see you too, Ellie.”
                  I take another step back.  “Why are you here?”  There’s venom in my voice.
                  “Because it’s a free country and I felt like getting a drink.”  He pushes his hand back through his light hair.  An abundance of gel makes it stick up every which way.  “And because Lily wanted to come see Ben and the rest of the guys play.”
                  “Oh,” I say, not liking that answer at all.  Lily is here.  Ben is here.  Ben and Lily are here at the same time. 
                  Drew doesn’t say anything else right away.  He looks out over the crowded bar, and when he turns back to me his face is different—softer.  Some of the anger that I was feeling a few seconds ago dissipates. 
    “ Don’t look at me like that.  It’s not like that between Lily and me.  I mean, not anymore,” he says, blinking his blue eyes.  “Maybe it was .  But, you have to understand that both of us know that we made a mistake.  A huge one.  I hate myself for it every single day.  Lily still loves Ben and so do I.  Both of us have been trying to make things right with him for months now, but he’ll barely speak to either one of us.  We thought that maybe… I don’t know… if we got a chance to talk to him again…” 
    Drew shoves his hands into his pockets and hunches his shoulders forward.  It’s a gesture so much like one that Ben would make that I half-believe him even if I don’t like the words that are coming out of his mouth.  Lily still loves Ben.  Loves .
    I want to throw-up or get another drink.  I’m not sure which. 
    “For God’s sake, they were engaged and now he won’t even answer her phone calls.”
    Now I really want to throw up.   
    “Did you know that?”  I don’t even know why he bothers asking me that question.  I’m pretty sure he can tell by the shell-shocked expression on my face that I didn’t know that Ben and Lily were engaged.  Engaged.  What. The. Hell.
    I close my eyes and suck in a jagged breath.  My heart is pounding.  My head is pounding.  In fact, every single part of me is pounding furiously at the same time.  It’s really a feat of nature that I’m still standing on two feet. 
    “ Drew, why are you telling me any of this?”
    “Because it seemed like you and Ben were friends.  Probably more than friends from the little that I saw that night at the Halloween party at your place.”  He shrugs like none of it matters.  “Or maybe you’re nothing at all to each other, and who knows why I wanted to tell you?  Maybe I don’t even need a reason.  I just thought that you should know.”
    “Where’ s Lily now?” I hear myself asking in a high-pitched voice that I don’t even recognize as my own.   
    He gestures with his chin.  “She went to the back hoping that she’d be able to talk to Ben before he and the guys go on stage.  She wants him to understand the way that things are so that he can start to forgive her.”
    I don’t wait to hear more.  Everything about this night is twisted and confused. 
    I leave my empty glass on the bar top and let my feet propel me through the crowd ed space.  Payton’s going to be pissed when she can’t find me, but I don’t care about that right now.  I just need to see Ben.  After this shitty day, I need to know what’s going on. 
    I step through the closed door that Payton pointed out to me earlier into a dimly lit narrow hallway.  The walls are lined with dark wood paneling.  There are two doors on my left and three on my right.  The first one I try is locked.  So is the one opposite it.  The handle turns on the next knob and I push the door open. 
    Even though I think that I’m prepared for what I’ll find beyond that door, I’m not.  Not by half.
    Ben and Lily are standing in the middle of a small room that looks like someone’s office.  There’s a desk and some chairs haphazardly pushed up against the far wall and a large somewhat bizarre ceramic statue of the Three Stooges on a metal shelf in the corner.  I don’t have time to dwell on the strangeness of the statue because Ben’s got his