One Hundred Names (Special Edition)

the things you’ll be purchasing this year for your clients.’
    ‘Well,’ he looked directly at the camera, ‘we have this Tom Ford iPad sleeve. Perfect for the man in your life who loves designer accessories. It will also keep the iPad protected from the sand on upcoming summer hols. It retails at one thousand five hundred euro, which is a great price for such a luxury.’
    Eva’s eyes widened.
    ‘Stop it,’ Gaby muttered under her breath and the sound man threw her a look.
    ‘We also have this Coco Chanel umbrella. Perfect for the lady in your life who doesn’t like to get wet.’
    ‘Great for the frizzy-hair, girls,’ Laura said to the camera, and the camera went wild in response, moving in so close to her face it almost headbutted her.
    ‘And that retails at one thousand euro.’
    Eva’s mouth dropped, as did Kitty’s, but Kitty wasn’t currently on camera. She could feel Gaby raging beside her.
    ‘What celebrities will you be shopping for?’ Laura asked.
    ‘Oh, we get them all in here.’ Jack proceeded to list any stars who were known to be jetting into the Irish capital for summer concerts and Kitty noted his use of the word ‘possibly’ before he named anyone.
    ‘Wow. Hear that guys? Madonna! Moving on, Eva, these sunglasses we see on the likes of Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes, who would you see yourself buying these for?’
    ‘Of my clients?’
    ‘Come on, come on,’ Gaby urged.
    ‘Well, my client list is strictly private, I wouldn’t—’
    ‘Yes, but what
kind
of person would you buy these for?’
    ‘Who would I buy sunglasses for?’ She looked around as if someone was playing a trick on her.
    ‘Worn by Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes,’ Laura said through gritted teeth. Eva’s mouth opened and closed but no words would come out.
    ‘Well, can I just say,’ Jack jumped in, ‘these glasses would be perfect for the women in your life who just love Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes and who don’t want the sun in their eyes this summer.’
    ‘So there you have it, guys, top tips on how to buy the perfect gift for that extra special person in your life to help them feel like a celebrity.’
    Cut.
    Eva jumped off the stool.
    ‘Jesus Christ,’ Kitty heard Laura say to the camerawoman as they were packing up. ‘What are we doing next? Vajazzling?’
    ‘How to help them feel like a celebrity?’ Eva said to Gaby once they were outside on Henry Street. She wasn’t shouting but her anger was obvious. ‘Sunglasses? To make people feel like a celebrity? Jesus, Gaby!’
    ‘Okay, so that was not the best booking I’ve ever made.’
    ‘Not the best? Gaby, it was the worst. Of a very bad lot. How can I share what my business is about when you keep getting me publicity like this? The message is getting lost. Nobody is listening. They don’t care about “Dedicated”, they only care about my
celebrity
client list and
George Clooney
? What was that about?’ Eva’s voice was still quiet but her annoyance was clear. Knowing Eva wasn’t yet aware of her presence, Kitty remained in the background, quite enjoying the display of Eva’s true opinion of the show.
    ‘It impresses people. It helps bookings,’ Gaby shrugged.
    ‘The fact that I did
not
buy a gift for George Clooney impresses people?’
    ‘People mostly just listen to the questions.’
    Eva closed her eyes and took deep breaths. ‘I would rather not do interviews at all if these are the kind that we’re getting.’
    ‘It helps build your profile.’
    ‘You think
that
helped?’
    ‘Maybe not that.’
    Eva groaned. ‘All my hard work.’ But Kitty could see she was calming down. ‘We need publicity that allows me to
talk
about the gift of giving, how precious it is, how special it can be, particularly in these times when people are really struggling. It’s not about how expensive something is – as a nation we’ve stopped giving lavish gifts – it’s actually about
thinking
about what to give someone, how it can lift them when they’re down, how they can feel loved and important and special just by one simple gesture.’
    ‘I know, I know, you don’t have to tell me all this, I know it all,’ Gaby said, stuffing chewing gum into her mouth. If she wasn’t talking it seemed her mouth needed to be moving up and down regardless.
    ‘Do you?’ Eva looked at Gaby.
    ‘I’m shocked and appalled that you’ve asked me that,’ she said dramatically, and Kitty felt that was for her benefit. ‘How long