Only 06 - Winter Fire

When they finally finished off the women, they took the children and…”
    The silence that followed was even more unbearable than his eyes.
    Sarah remembered then what Lola had said about the Culpeppers.
    They sold kids to the Comancheros, after doing things to the young’uns that would shame Satan .
    â€œWhen I finally found Em and Ted, I didn’t have a shovel,” Case whispered. “I dug their grave with my fingernails. Then I went looking for Culpeppers.”
    She watched his eyes and wept silently, helplessly, for she knew now just what had driven Case away from laughter and hope and love.
    His memories must be even worse than her own.
    â€œNow do you understand why I pushed you away?” he asked.
    Silently she looked at him, hurting for him.
    â€œTed and Em’s death…” His voice died. He shrugged. “It killed something in me. I can’t give you what you deserve.”
    â€œWhat I deserve?” she asked, not understanding.
    â€œA husband. Children. Love. It isn’t in me anymore. It’s as dead as little Em.”
    â€œI don’t believe it. Anyone as gentle as you hasn’t lost the ability to love.”
    Case looked directly into Sarah’s eyes.
    â€œAll I have for you is lust,” he said bluntly. “When a man has seduction on his mind, he’ll do whatever will get him what he wants quickest. You wanted tenderness. I gave it to you.”
    Sarah’s smile quivered, yet it was very real.
    â€œDid I ask for anything more?” she whispered.
    â€œYou don’t have to. It’s there in the way you look at me when you think I don’t know.”
    â€œLike I want to put a knife in your back?” she suggested, smiling despite her tears.
    The corner of his mouth lifted, making him look even sadder than before.
    â€œYou can’t fool me,” he said. “You’re like a beehive. Once you get past the sting, there’s nothing but pure sweetness beneath.”
    â€œWe’re both fully grown. You want something I can give you and I want it, too.”
    He shook his head.
    â€œYou just said you wanted me,” she pointed out. “Well, I want you.”
    He looked at her scarlet cheeks, tear-bright eyes, and trembling lips.
    â€œPure wild honey,” he said huskily. “Don’t tempt me.”
    â€œWhy not?”
    â€œI could make a baby with you, that’s why.”
    â€œA baby,” she repeated softly.
    Then she smiled.
    Case pushed her away.
    â€œI don’t want a child,” he said. “Ever.”
    Her arms tightened around him. She stood on tiptoe and kissed the corner of his mouth. Then she touched his lower lip with the tip of her tongue.
    He jerked back as though he had been stung.
    â€œDon’t tease me into making you pregnant,” he said harshly. “I would hate both of us for it. Is that what you want?”
    She closed her eyes and let go of him. Without a word she went and picked up the spindle and began the endless work of spinning.
    A moment later the harsh sound of corn being crushed between two rocks came from the other end of the room.
    Neither Sarah nor Case spoke again.

19
    â€œ T hat hombre is a grinding fool,” Lola said, surveying the mound of cornmeal Case had made the night before.
    Sarah didn’t say anything.
    â€œYou got a lot of spinning done, too,” Lola noticed.
    â€œConner is growing faster than a weed.”
    â€œAnd Case is as twitchy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.”
    â€œI hadn’t noticed.”
    Lola’s crack of laughter made Sarah wince.
    â€œDon’t you know by now how to take the heat out of a man’s mad?” Lola asked.
    â€œIt takes two.”
    â€œYou saying you don’t want him?”
    â€œNo. I’m saying he doesn’t want me.”
    â€œHorseshit.”
    â€œAmen,” Sarah muttered.
    She worked the spindle so hard it became a blur. The pile of wool beneath her fingers turned into yarn with astonishing speed.
    Lola didn’t take the hint and drop the subject.
    â€œHe’s got a real lust for you,” she said. “Gets hard as a post just lookin’ at you.”
    The spindle jerked. The yarn stretched almost to the point of breaking.
    â€œAll right,” Sarah said through her teeth. “Case wants me but he won’t touch me because he doesn’t want to get me pregnant. Satisfied?”
    Lola