Simmer Down

most of the night.”
    Snacker placed his hands on his chest. “I will handle everything from here on out. You have my word. That way, you and your lovely lady will have the rest of the evening to yourselves.”
    “You got yourself a deal,” Josh happily agreed.
    We ran into Adrianna in the middle of the dining room. Yet again, she was returning from the ladies’ room.
    “Are you feeling all right?” I asked her, as we reached our table. “You’ve been to the bathroom, like, a hundred times tonight.”
    “Yeah. I’m okay,” she said vaguely. “Nothing serious.” Josh pulled over a stray chair for himself and scooted in next to me. Everyone else at the table had finished dessert, and Doug glowered at me for having left him stranded with my family for so long.
    “I’m sorry,” I apologized. “Are you okay?”
    “Yes. But you owe me one. Your nephew spent ten minutes telling me more than I wanted to know about Thomas the Tank Engine and all of Thomas’s little train friends. Did you know that Thomas is a boy and has a penis?”
    I glanced over at Walker, who was busy examining the underside of his train.
    “I thought I might die of boredom. You better have worked things out with Josh.” Doug looked hopefully at me. “Don’t leave me again!”
    “We have. I’ll go hang out with your right-wing parents as payback. Deal?”
    Doug nodded, happy in the knowledge that my spending an evening with his less-than-liberal mother and father would more than compensate for having abandoned him at Simmer.
    My banana ice cream had melted, and the caramelized bananas were now cold, but even so, my dessert was wonderful. Doug had saved me a bite of the rich chocolate torte and had even left me a couple of raspberries. One taste and I had yet more reasons to be head over heels for my chef!
    “Is something going on with Owen?” Doug wondered aloud.
    “What do you mean? He looks fine to me,” I said, licking my fork in a display of uncouth table manners. “Adrianna’s the one I’m a little worried about. She’s spent half the night in the ladies’ room. It’s not the food, obviously. Everyone else is fine, and Josh is a fiend about fresh ingredients and a sanitary kitchen. What do mean about Owen?”
    “I don’t know. He’s all fidgety tonight, like he’s anxious or something.”
    “I have no idea.”
    As if on cue, Owen stood up from his chair. Unfortunately, he had tucked the tablecloth into his pants, so we all spent a few moments picking up spilled glasses and rearranging dinner plates.
    “My apologies,” Owen said formally. “I’m a little nervous. But I have something to say.” He buttoned his jacket and ran a hand through his hair. “Adrianna—” he began with a loving look at my best friend.
    Oh, my God! He was going to propose! This was so exciting! It’s not often that you get to witness a proposal. Usually you just get a giddy phone call from a friend, or one day your girlfriend holds up her hand to show off a new ring. But to be right here while my best friend got engaged was too exciting for words!
    No wonder Adrianna hadn’t been feeling well! She must have suspected that Owen was going to ask her tonight. She wasn’t sick; she was nervous. I looked wistfully at Ade and prepared myself for what was bound be a totally romantic proposal from Owen.
    Adrianna was ashen. Seriously. No color in her face whatsoever. Wow, maybe she hadn’t suspected after all. Maybe she really was surprised, and now the monumental significance of what was about to happen was sending her into shock. I wished that Owen would hurry up. What if Adrianna collapsed and had to be rushed off in an ambulance? Well, I’d miss witnessing my first marriage proposal, that’s what.
    Josh grabbed my hand tightly. “Uh-oh,” he said softly.
    Uh-oh? What does he mean by uh-oh? She was going to say yes. Why wouldn’t she? I turned to Josh with irritation. What was he talking about?
    “I am completely in love with you,” Owen was saying.
    We all made appropriate oohing noises in support of Owen’s declaration.
    Josh squeezed my hand tighter. “Oh, no.”
    “What?” I whispered confused. “ ‘Oh, no’ what?” I was really annoyed at him for interrupting my enjoyment of Adrianna and Owen’s engagement.
    “Snacker,” Josh whispered back.
    Snacker? What did Snacker have to do with anything? Everything was under control in the kitchen. Only a few minutes earlier, he’d taken a solemn oath to handle