Soul Beach

like we did when we were alive. That even though we have peachy bodies and clothes that never need pressing, we’re still the same underneath.’
    ‘Do you believe that?’
    He looks up at me. ‘Sure. Whatever the hell we are, we’re not angels. You’ve only gotta listen to Javier for a few minutes to know that.’
    I smile. ‘True. Nothing angelic about him.’
    ‘I’m no nicer. Scratch my surface and you’ll find a snob. I was brought up in a family where we felt we were better than everyone else. Now I’m here, it’s hard for me not to judge the jocks and the male models and the bikini girls.’
    The way he says it makes me feel self-conscious. ‘And me?’
    He looks at me steadily. ‘No, Alice. You’re different.’
    Something about his directness makes me blush. I look away. ‘Am I? I mean, apart from looking frumpier in a bikini, how am I different?’ When I look up again, I realise he’s still gazing at me.
    ‘You need to ask?’
    ‘I just did, didn’t I?’
    ‘It has nothing to do with bikinis.’ He shuffles the cards some more. ‘Apart from anything else, you happen to be alive.’
    ‘Oh. That.’ I laugh. ‘Sorry.’
    ‘Not just that . . .’ Danny seems to be thinking something over. He shakes his head. ‘Ah, let’s go back to Triti, huh? It’s so much simpler. She’s in a bad place right now. Think about it. When life got too much for her, whatever the reason, she made a choice to keep shrinking and shrinking until she was nothing.’
    How can he describe the decision to starve yourself to death like it’s no bigger deal than choosing your A Level subjects?
    ‘What kind of a choice was that? What about her family?’
    Danny frowns. ‘Maybe it was her family that made that choice inevitable. Who knows? My point is, here the choices are meaningless. What colour tee to wear today. Whether to hang out under this tree or that one. Hell, even eating isn’t a real choice if you never feel hungry. She’s stuck. We all know she has to accept that, but it doesn’t make it any easier.’
    ‘And if she doesn’t accept it? If she can’t?’
    ‘I didn’t design this place, Alice. If I had, I sure as hell would have introduced a Game Over option, for when we can’t take any more. OK, so then the Beach would only have the jocks and the bikini girls left, because anyone with an IQ bigger than their chest size would take the opt out. Leave paradise for the dumb . . .’
    ‘You’re being judgmental again, Danny.’
    ‘Just a sign of how relaxed I can be around you, baby.’
    Funny how good knowing that makes me feel . But I push the thought away. ‘Baby?’ I make my voice mocking.
    ‘It’s what I call all the girls.’
    ‘Are you flirting with me, Daniel?’
    The cards he’s shuffling explode from his hands, scattering across the sand. His head stays down as he picks them up again.
    ‘Wouldn’t dare. Anyhow. Back to Triti. They made a dumb mistake, with the fireworks. Gave her the idea that she had some control. It’s bad for everyone. It’s . . . disruptive. That’s why the weather’s so good today, I think.’
    ‘As opposed to every other day when the sun shines,’ I say, pretending I hadn’t noticed.
    He leans forward. ‘No. It’s different,’ he whispers. ‘One thing I noticed. They use the weather here. If everyone’s edgy, they make it so hot that it dampens us down. Right now they’re going heavy on bliss.’
    ‘They?’
    He shakes his head. ‘They? God? Your own twisted imagination? Who knows? But hey, Alice, if this is all your twisted imagination, do you think you could imagine up a video game or two for me? I sure miss Grand Theft Auto.’
    I laugh. His sense of humour makes me feel better, too. When I’m with Meggie, I feel responsible for her, especially now I’ve decided to see if I can change things for her. But with Danny it’s like I’m the one being looked after.
    ‘I don’t think there’s much I can do about that. But . . . well, you know your theory. About resolution in the real world affecting stuff here?’
    Danny stops laughing. ‘Uh-huh?’
    ‘I think it could be time for me to test it out. I might be able to help Triti.’ I stop there, scared to say more in case I’m jinxed or banned.
    ‘You know what, Alice? If you’re serious, then that makes you even more special. Because I think you might be pretty much the only person who can rescue Triti from forever.’

41
    I’m fighting to keep my eyes open, but I’m too