The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared

successful company. Almost everyone on the island in need of a driver’s licence wanted to be taught by the nice white man. And Herbert rapidly grew in this role. He gave all the theory lessons himself, and in a friendly yet authoritative manner explained that it was important not to drive too fast because then you might crash. And you shouldn’t drive too slowly either, because then you obstructed traffic. The teacher seemed to know what he was talking about.
    After six months, the island’s two other driving schools closed for lack of customers, and now Herbert had a monopoly. He told Allan about this during one of his weekly visits to the beach.
    ‘I’m proud of you, Herbert,’ said Allan. ‘That you of all people got involved in driving instruction! And here where they drive on the left…’
    ‘Drive on the left?’ said Herbert. ‘Do they drive on the left in Indonesia?’
     
    Amanda had been busy too. First, she had acquired a proper education, and now she had a degree in economics. It had taken a few weeks and had cost quite a lot, but in the end she had the certificate in her hand. Top grades too, from one of the better universities in Java.
    And with a university degree behind her, she had gone for a long walk along the beach at Kuta and thought hard. What could she do here in life that would bring good fortune to her family? Even with her degree in economics it was still rather hard to count. But perhaps she should… could she possibly? Yes, I’ll damn well do it, Amanda Einstein thought.
    ‘I’ll go into politics!’
     
    Amanda Einstein founded the Liberal Democratic Freedom Party (she thought the three words liberal, democracy and freedom sounded good together). She immediately had 6,000 imaginary members all of whom thought she should stand for election as governor in the autumn. The sitting governor would be standing down for reasons of age, and before Amanda had her idea there was only one likely candidate to take over. Now there were two. One of them was a man of the Pedana caste, the other was a woman of the Sudra caste. The result of the election was preordained, to Amanda’s disadvantage. If it wasn’t for the fact that she had a pile of dollars.
     
    Herbert had nothing against his beloved going into politics, but he knew that Allan disliked politics in general and after his years in the Gulag disliked communism in particular.
    ‘Are we going to become communists?’ he asked uneasily.
    No, Amanda didn’t think they would. That word wasn’t in the party name. But if Herbert really wanted to become communist, they could probably add it.
    ‘The Liberal Democratic Communist Freedom Party,’ said Amanda and felt how the name rolled off her tongue. A bit long perhaps, but it could work.
    But that wasn’t what Herbert meant. Quite the opposite, he thought. The less their party could devote itself to politics, the better.
    They discussed how to finance their campaign. According to Amanda, they wouldn’t have a lot of dollars left when the campaign was over, because it was expensive to win. What did Herbert think?
    Herbert replied that he was certain that Amanda was the one in the family who best understood that matter. There wasn’t much competition, admittedly.
    ‘Great,’ said Amanda. ‘Then we’ll use one third of our capital for my election campaign, one third for bribes for the heads of the election districts, one third for muddying the reputation of the main opponent, and then we’ll keep one third to live on if things don’t work out. What do you think?’
    Herbert scratched his nose and didn’t think anything at all. But he did tell Allan about Amanda’s plans and Allan sighed at the thought that somebody who couldn’t distinguish between banana liquor and vodka now believed she could become governor. But so what, they had started off with a bundle of dollars from Mao Tse-tung, and there was more than enough left of Allan’s half. So he promised Herbert and Amanda that he would give them some more after the election. But after that he didn’t want to hear of any more projects concerning things that Herbert and Amanda didn’t understand.
    Herbert thanked him for the offer. Allan was a very kind man, that much was clear.
     
    However, Allan’s help was not needed. The governor’s election was a complete success for Amanda. She won with more than eighty per cent of the votes, and her opponent got twenty-two per cent. The opponent thought that the total of more